My bittersweet days.

2011-10-10T10:53:00.003+08:00

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

it has been more than a year since i last logged in to my blogspot. i'm so happy today! <3

; MOVED

2010-04-03T19:46:00.003+08:00

http://nurkasehismail.onsugar.com

bye blogspot, hello onsugar!

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-31T03:11:00.002+08:00

Hi readers! i dont feel like studying, so i blog again! say wheee, say yay! ;D

my phone is currenly not w me now, it's w sisAeynn and i'm lazy to go to th other room to take my phone from her. but nevermind, comfirm no one texts me. pathetic, me.

anyway, th girl next to me is nurul jannah! my girlfriend, my baby, my everything. chey, hahah! she's th girl that most guys who sent me messages on facebook thought that i'm having an affair w. oh please, she's my best girlfriend laa! and, i'm straight for goodness sake (:

so yup, we met again on tuesday, which was yesterday. merayaaaap aja tau ni dua anak. hahaha. met at pasiris and i was late again, i will never be an early bird, sheesh! sorreh ya b sebab gwe telat, sayang lho! winkwink.

then, where we went after that? mhmmm. oh! went ehub, roamed there, and then.. had our brunch at kfc. oh my, i swear we were like bitches, hahaha. laughing out so loudly, i can never control my laughter when i'm w this girl, she never failed to make me laugh. she and her nonsense, tak habishabis tau ni anak. hahaha.

seriously... i could still laugh now when i recall back all th funny things happened yesterday. hahahahahha. okay nevermind, kaseh macam shiok sendiri gitu, ketawa sorangsorang sekarang -.-

saw K.A. again, this time, he was eating next to th table which jana and i was sitting at. i was very shy actually, but i actionaction tak malu. hahaha. then after jana and i had finished our meal, we left th place. oh ya, i bided goodbye to K.A. first. hahaha.

jannah and i then walked around pasiris. wanted to find something but it couldn't be found and we gave up, so we then bused to changi airport and there, we roamed around. alot of funny things happened there. hahahah. 'kaminkerang'. *inside joke* hahahaha. itu short form untuk 'come in and look around' eh jannah? memandai aja. hahaha.

and to our surprised, we saw lina! yes lina, our girlfriend. yippie yay. didnt know lina is working at changi airport. oh yup, we came towards lina.. dari jauh, lina couldn't recognise us. hahahah. she told us that from afar.. we looked like nerdy japanese girls. hahahaha. she kept on saying, "selenga nya korang dua, macam budak jepon selenga". hahahhaa.

i told jana to ignore th word selenga and notice th word japanese. and by saying that we looked like japanese is actually a compliment. hahaha. jannah and myself were like, very happy. hahahah, kental :P

then trained to pasiris, roamed at whitesands and then, jannah went to work. i bused home, yeah had to go home, mum was all alone.

hopefully mum will get well soon. and jannah b, thanks for th day tau. sayang you! xoxo.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; Girlfriends, i love you.

2010-03-30T08:15:00.000+08:00

Hi lovely readers, i'm here to blog again. i havent got th mood to study yet, so i decided to blog and waste my time uploading pictures.

so yeah, last monday was last minute girlfriends meet up. as usual, not complete. most of them were doing their own things. since jannah and i were so free and had nothing to do in th afternoon, we decided to visit ifa at bedok south secondary school. ifa was a sweetheart to skip ers just to spend time w th both of us, aww.

spending time w dearest ifa and jannah were really great and full of laughters, as always. my jaw was cramped due to laughing too much!

full of gossips and sharing of problems. th best part was gossiping and it was a lil different this time because we gossiped about th guys.. only th guys! hahaha. very funny you know. we gossiped about th guys from facebook. yes, those nuisance and flirtatious type of guys. hahaha. eg.. i was talking about this guy.. then jannah said, she knows th guy.. ifa then said she also knows th same guy.

so moral of th story, when guys send messages on facebook, not because he really wants to know you, he was just TRYING HIS LUCK. seolah-olah macam, 'kalau dapat, dapat ah. kalau tak dapat, tak pasal. masih ada banyak lagi perempuan'. that was th most guys' thinking. dont say i anyhow talk ok. i got proof ok, boo.

i know my jannah's password and at times.. i log in her account to see someone's profile. then when im bored, i randomly check her messages and th same guys message me th same messages that were sent to jannah. i bet, ifa got th same messages too. i bet you girls toooo!

ommmmg, im starting to hate guys even moreeee. sheeesh. okay i know i know, not all guys are th same -.- macam whatever gitu kan lelakilelaki zaman sekarang, apa aja.

so yup, then around 3:40pm, ifa had to go for her dance class. left jannah and me in th toilet, snapping pictures. hahaha. minutes later, we went to th music room to have a last glance of ifa. haha, macam sweet gitu kan. walaupun tak dapat bid goodbye because she was too busy, kita lihat sahaja dari jauh. hehehe. wait.. correction! not last glance forever eh. i mean, last glance for that very day. kalau forever, kaseh menagis tak berlagu oi.

jannah and i bused to pasiris and roamed at whitesands. then jannah had to go work while me, i had to go to my night class.

class ended, i bused back to pasiris to meet my jannah. we went home together. sweet gitu kan. hehehe. no, it didnt waste my ezlink card cause i was using jannah's cocession. hahaha.

oh before that kaaaan, we took th bus at downtown instead of interchange. haha, kaki gatal, malammalam buta merayap pergi busstop yang lebih jauh. so roamed at downtown for awhile and surprisingly i saw K.A. and his friends outside 7/11.

i blushed when i read his onsugar. hehehehehehehe.

many more pictures will be uploaded on facebook soon (:

thanks for th day lovely girlfriends, i love you girls. and i really miss th rest! yayah tikah lina muny sepet, if you girls were to read this kaaaaan, please make yourself free on th 9th april? not comfirm yet. kalau free, message kaseh! outing, outing, outing! xoxo! much loves.

will update about tuesday outing soon! and tomorrow, in th afternoon, jannah and i will be visiting our girlfriend, lina! yes, at her work place. sweet tak kita? hehehehe. ni la hidup orangorang yang selalu free, merayap, buang duit aja tawuuuu. hahaha. ok bye, nk belajar! loveloves.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-30T01:54:00.001+08:00

Hi lovely readers. i'm at home now, i couldn't attend chemistry class today as no one is taking care of mum. i should be studying now... not blogging! sheeeeesh, kaseh kaseh, tsk.

so yup, cik sam and i went to accompany mum on last friday! mum underwent an operation. actually th operation was supposed to take place on th tuesday but it was postponed to friday, yes.. last minute postpone. and tell you what, i was in th hosp for 13hours, yes 13 solid hours. imagine that, dudes and dudettes! i was totally fatigued, i tell you. furthermore, i only had two hours of sleep th night before. ishk!

before mum went for operation, she told cik sam and i that she wanna eat nasi ayam penyet after th operation, then go geylang and jalanjalan. cik sam and i laughed upon hearing that!

sebelum menjalani pembedahan, sudah rancang dengan semangatnya mahu ke geylang, mahu makan ini lah, itu lah. selepas pembedahan, seluruh badan lemah, nak berbual pun tak bermaya. nak makan pun tak ada selera. hahaha, ibu ibu, tsk.

due to her weak condition, she had to be warded and discharged only on th next day. so yup, sis and i had to fetch mum. i was th only one who could go up to mum's ward, sis couldn't and so, i had to give malay class a miss and had to cancel th plan of going out w my friend.

13hours of waiting to go home was really exhausting and obviously, was mundane. i reached sgh around 8 in th morning and left th place around 9 in th night. cik sam went home around 6pm and i was all alone after that. mum refused to talk to me because she had no mood, too weak at that point of time. so just sat there and waited for sis and dad to arrive. i waited almost three hours for their arrival.

i had to wait for sis and dad.. and only then, i could have my dinner. yes, i skipped breakfast and lunch. bleah. i only had bread for breakfast and lunch. was totally famished, you know! pity me, pity kaseh ):

in th morning, waiting for cik sam.

mum was talking w cik sam. and me? i have nothing else to do other than snapping pictures of myself. bleahaha.

mum was waiting for her turn to do operation..

shiok sendiri pictures.

another shiok sendiri pictures.

that's all for now. i'l update about my monday and tuesday outing soon okay! many more pictures to be uploaded! i'l find th time to update my blog. i am just sooo super busy nowdays!

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-28T23:54:00.001+08:00

After months of not meeting my dearest bestfriend, izyan syahida.. and finally! we met today, in th afternoon. i was excited you know ^^

so yeah, met my zyzybaby at bedok interchange and we then bused to tampines and studied at tamp mcd. thanks zyzy for teaching me :D

after about a couple of hours studying, we headed to tamp one, Diva. so yup, bought my things and oh yup, before headed to mcd, we went Popular to find my books and bah, th chem book is still out of stock! ergh. but managed to get my mothertongue book, so yup.

we then bused to afgan to get my contact lens but no stock, sheesh. so bused to bedok and finally, got my lens! yaaaaaay. no more 'no-mood-to-go-class', i can see th whiteboard clearly now. yippie!

i then accompanied zyzybaby to take her altered skirt and after which, i went to check my weight. yes, everytime i woke up.. i tend to look at th mirror and i will go like, "omg, why do i look so fat?!" and so yup, i was curious and went to check my weight.

fifty-one point six (51.6) sheeeeeeesh, i told you already i'm fat. months ago, my weight was 49.5kg. seeeeee, fat right?! ): *stress*

i wanna lose weight till 44kg please?! just wait and see! hmphhhhhhhh. bye.

oh ya, thanks zyzybaby for th day. you know, you will always be remembered by me. bff, i love you. date w me soon okay love? xoxo.

reached home around 6pm and bleah, i was totally fatigued that i immediately lied on th bed for minutes and stared at th ceiling, nothing was on my mind.

then.. that th door was knocked and it was cik sam, kak dirah and ayu. th three sweethearts came to visit my mum. aww, so thoughtful of them and cik sam brought goreng pisang and some other delicious kuihs (:

ayu is cute, as always. i miss looking at her sweet looking face, i couldn't wait for this coming friday, trip to kota tinggi w family and cik sam's family. wooohooo.

and oh my, i just went to sisAeynn's onsugar. some part was touching, some was.... no comment. memalu kan orang aja tau ni anaaaaak. sheeesh. must you tell th whole world that i go for taaaaall and thinnn guys? and th hint was so obvious eh please? grrrrrrrrr. sister, if you want to go queensway, i'l be a sweetheart to accompany you okay? winkwink. gataaaaaal eh kak! hahahahaa.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-28T22:59:00.002+08:00

Chatango offline messages replied :D

anon1 (10:48:01 PM): babe, tkmu private your blog okay? im your daily reader, hard to read if it's privated.
reply: oh dont worry, i wont delete, thanks for being my daily blog reader, hehehe :D

anon2 (07:23:32 AM): dgr dgr baru bangon pakai makeup pe
reply: mungkin awak tak baca post saya betulbetul? th post was posted around 6pm. i was out at 1pm to fetch my mum from hosp and then, reached home around 3plus and slept w make ups on. then woke up and blogged. so yup, ive explained, hopefully you understand (: mhmm, atau awak tak faham? nak saya menterjemahkan dalam bahasa melayu? (:

anon1 (01:27:42 AM): hey babe. ur eyelashes dari mane? :)
reply: eyelashes yang mana? :D

anon1 (11:48:27 PM): i dont have any other way to chat with u except through my hp *your number*.i just want to make friends.could you text me if its possible.whats e harm of making friends right (:
reply: its better if you add me up at msn, and we'll make friends there, hee :D yes, no harm making friend (:

anon4 (08:54:10 PM): Your mum went through what operation? Hope she pulls through. And anyway, how much does the Guess wallet and Prada beg cost for you and your sis ?
reply: thanks alot :D i dont know? i forgotten how much sis and i spent for both wallet and bag (:

anon2 (06:41:23 PM): send my wish to your mum for her bdae. that's nice of you for realising her kindness and all . also nice of you having a beautiful mum . and yeah may GOD be with her during her operation . and may GOD bless you that you love your mum ..
reply: oh thanks alot, dear you. thanks for complimenting my mum and all, smile always and may god bless you too :D

anon5 (10:53:35 PM): hey what mascara brand do you use? and your hot btw :)
reply: oh thanks alot :D im currently using maybelline (:

anon3 (08:42:07 PM): u act in art and el?? omg georgeous :D
reply: thanks alot for th compliment, erm yes just a short role (:

anon1 (02:21:44 PM): you follow your mum's look & yr sis follow yr dad's. so im not surprise if anyone asked if she's your mum or your sister. th thing is, both of you are gorgeous. so stay gorgeous alright!
reply: thanks alot, dear you. thanks for th compliment :D hee he.

emothishaa (04:55:54 AM): hi kaseh. sorry to disturb you but your recent post about this guy who's attch n want to get to know you and passed his number. may i know his fb name? sorry kalau kpo but truth to be told, my bf is one of them who tries to contact you on fb.
reply: um, i can't remember his name, i've deleted th msg away. i am really sorry about that. and how do you know that you boyfriend tried to cntact me through facebook?

anon2 (02:02:20 PM): hi kaseh! i saw you the other time tempat bedok int. hehe. anw, i agree with you part "it is never easy to find th minority who is very faithful and nice one.". memang susah kan nak cari lelaki baek? haha. anw, stay happy w your girlfriends !. (:
reply: hey, you saw me? hee, hope to see you around :D and yes, it is never never easy. hmph. hehe. aww, thanks alot dear :D

anon1 (11:35:50 AM): yana B - never relink me? so sad. haha. relink me bby. :D
reply: hello yaaaana, hehe. relink? i dont have your link la darling. gimme your new url! hehehe :D

anon1 (09:52:30 PM): dian : eh b. i first time tag dekat chatango ni seh -.- i miss you to the max please? ): meet soon. ilmy ! <3
reply: fristime b? apa laaa you. baru skrg nk tag. hehehehe. oh i miss you moreee tau dian tau! yes yes meet soon, real soon please! i love miss you too! <3

anon1 (03:53:55 AM): Kaseh mind telling me where you're schooling now? Just curious. By the way, you're really a fillial daughter& you've gotten an awesome family who always got your back. Cherish them while they last. :D
reply: oh, its a night class and my class is all over th singapore, hehe. simei, bishan and yew tee. taking private o's (: and aww, thanks alot for saying that im a fillial daughter and about me having awesome family. thanks alot. but at times, i do have family problems too. so yup, hehe. have a nice day, you. may god bless you (:

anon3 (05:08:56 PM): ):hie ! Just passing by , eh you look nice in tudung ! cute ^^
reply: hehehe, hi! aww, thanks alot. :P :P

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-27T17:58:00.000+08:00

i've not been updating my blog, sorry for that. i've been very busy nowdays. it has been some time since i last went out to spend time w friends. i'm currently not active on faceboooook. busyyyy, like seriously. ayayaaai.

i just woke up and yes, th pictures above were just snapped a few seconds ago. ha ha ha. and im munching on a bread now. bangun, terus makan. best. i need to lose weight, i'm fat, chubby ):

sis and i woke up late justnow in th morning. we left home around 1plus and then, cabbed to sgh to fetch mum. mum has discharged from hosp but she's still weak. kesian ibu ):

i'm really really busy, got so many things to do now. and later, sis and i will be heading to parkway. setakat nak beli dress tu kat cotton on. ye, setakaaat.

mum can't cook, so what to eat todaaaaaay? eat outside? tak sedap laa fast food ni semua ): cook for th family? will discuss about this w sis! hahaha. idea yang menarik, hehehee.

i'l update more, soon. many pictures to be uploaded. stay tune!

assalammualaikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-23T02:30:00.003+08:00

Hi awesome readers! :D

in case you dont know, i've activated back my facebook account. i think i'm gonna deactivate it again because somehow, facebook is like an irritant to me, currently.

perhaps, i might privatised my blog... again, someday. mahu menghilangkan diri dari alam siber buat sementara waktu :O

i'm still considering if i should change my number or not. i'm sick of being pestered, sick of being scolded for unreasonable reasons from some random blokes. i got irritating blokes in my phone contacts bugging me to reply them every seconds. i dont use my free time to text and i'm not free all th times. i got alot of things to do. no, i'm not being a snob. this is just me. it's just that, i dont like whenever same questions in th conversation keep on repeating like for example, "what you doing?", "eaten", etc, and after sometime, th same question will be asked again. mundane, real much! that's why i would rather spend my time sleeeeping! ^.^

someone thinks that i'm no longer straight because i don't seem to be interested in guys anymore o.O and some even thinks that i'm in relationship w my girlfriend, nurul jannah, *slap forehead* omgggggg. it's a sin, for goodness sake.

some asked me why i dont want to be in relationship? well, i got alot of reasons and one of th reason
is... click on th picture below to enlarge it... and read (:

what will his girlfriend feeels if she knows that her boyfriend is like this; th flirty type? and i tell you what, this is not th firstime i receive this kind of message, you know. seee, how can i trust guys? i know, not all guys are like this. but tell me, it is never easy to find th minority who is very faithful and nice one. whatever it is, i dont really care about th minority, im not even finding one now, *smile widely*

and if you read again, yes he said 'friend' but.. why afraid that th girlfriend will get angry? friend only whaaat? see.. girlfriend pula jangan asyik fikir negative ajaaaa.

and attached girls. sometimes, you can't totally blame th girls for talking w your boyfriend and assume that th girls are flirting w your sweetheart. get th full story first.

sikit sikit nak cakap, 'oh si kaseh tu memang suka flirt'. mulut tak ada insurance eh? seronok cakap orang macam gitu? think before you talk eh please. (woah, kaseh dh pandai marah :P)

at times, when i let out my feelings this way, i'm not really referring to one specific person. i just let out, and if anyone thinks he/she is th one im referring to, then i'm glad. macam tak buang masa gitu kan berbual tentang topik ini (:

anyway, i'l update about my kl trip soon. i'm fatigued. oh about my mum.. i went to th hospital in th morning, and mum's operation had to be postponed to this coming Friday. th reason? because mum was being stubborn! haha, she knew that she can't eat before th operation, but she ate alot. currypuffs la, roti la and macamacam lagi. ayaaayai, mummy mummy, tsk.

then, from sgh, cabbed to chinatown w mum and cik sam. very kecoh tau ni taxidriver. cab dia ada karoake everything, but very entertaining la, haha. and today, my day was full of laughter, thanks to mum and cik sam. haha. so yup, cik sam sang in th cab and mum was like, "mak mertua kaseh nyanyi". hahahah :P

from chinatown, we cabbed down to bedok and lunched at teh tarik. padahal tadi da makan tau kat sgh, abih makan lagi kat teh tarik, tsk. and omg, mum and cik sam.. mereka gossip maha gossip punya. hahaha. abih kaseh ketawa tak ingat dunia, as always. huahaha.

then my mum-in-law datang rumah and we watched tv, together w mum too. k da.

hahahahahahahahaha, chey woah woah, macam tak bersalah gitu cakap mum-in-law, eh kaseh?! kalaulah anaknya baca blog ni, buat malu jeeeeee :O boo hoo hoo.

k bye, mahu beradu. chey beradu, bahasa dirajaaaa ke hapaaa, hehehehee.

i miss my girls and cousins! hmph. and hopefully we'll be going holiday again on june! wheee.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; This beautiful lady... she's my everything (Y)

2010-03-22T04:35:00.003+08:00

This beautiful lady here is th one who has always been there for me since 1993. I was in her womb for 9months and 9days. This awesome lady had to get her stomach cut to deliver me out. i wasn't delivered out like how most did. And so, this pulchritudinous lady had to endure th awful pains for weeks after i was born. It took quite some time to heal th pain. Th operation was veritably unendurable but she was a strong lady, always been.

Seeing her smiles really soothes my heart. She is someone really special to me, very very special. Without her, i won't be able to see th world. Without her, i don't know th meaning of Love and Care.

She has never beaten me up or slapped me on th face. All i received from her was sincere Love and Care. And every scoldings i received from her was for my own good, i learnt from my mistakes. I sulk whenever she scolds me, then.. i'l refuse to talk to her, but this kind-hearted lady will come to me, and kiss my cheeks, and said, she loves me very much.

Sheesh, tears are currently streaming down my cheeks. No words could ever describe how much i love this amazing lady. and when i reminisce back all th bad things i've said and done to her, i feel really bad.

She's my one and only, Mum. My lovely mum. My beauteous mum. No one could ever replace her in my heart. Mum, forgive me for all th wrong-doings i've done. You know, i love you very much and i know you love me too.

Today, th 22nd of March. Happy fourty-fourth birthday, dearest Ibu, thanks for all th love and care you've given me. Thanks for never being sick of having a pampered child like me. Thanks for being such an understanding Mum. Thanks for always being there to listen to my problems. Thanks for giving me all my needs. Thanks for all th sacrifices you have done. You're such an awesome mum! I love you, Ibu.

Dad, SisAeynn and I love you very much. Life would be dull and meaningless without you, Mum.

Nur'ain Binte Ismail and Nurkaseh Binta Ismail, your 17years old and 19years old daughters are grateful to have you as a Mother and we promise to be good daughters (:

i'l be a good girl, good daughter and change for th better. i promise you, Mum.

and i also promise you that i will stop giving you this irritating face whenever i want you to entertain me or want you to put me to sleep. hehehe.

and oh Mum... you have to undergo an operation tomorrow. be strong, Mum. may god bless you and insyaallah, everything's gonna be alright.

i hope you like th presents that sisAeynn and i bought for you; Guess wallet and Prada bag. hehehehehe. i know you like it, most welcome Mum :P

once agaaaain, thanks for being such as amazing Mum! you're a year older now, hopefully strangers won't be asking me anymore if you're my mum or sister. whenever i was asked that ques, i will feel so oldddddddd, blehaha.

May happiness be w you and smile always. Stay pulchritudinous, lovely Mum.

Mum, remember that you got two lovely daughters and a great husband. Dont entertain all your peminats okay! cakap dengan dorang, 'takecare sudah'. hahaha.

and i got random cyberfriends said this to me,
"kaseh, you're pretty. but i think, your mum is hotter" O.o THAT IS SO STRAIGHT FORWARD PLEASE, MUST COMPARE EH? HAHAHHAAHA. but thanks, and i'm proud to have such a sweet-looking Mummmmy.

*kiss mum's cheeks and hug her tightly*

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; imaginations

2010-03-19T01:03:00.000+08:00

i was ten minutes late for history class and went in to th wrong class, ah.. so embarrassing. luckily Riah texted and told me that th class has changed to level2. during breaktime, i went to th canteen alone. and when th class is dismissed, i walked to th interchange w a guyfriend. trained home. i regretted buying a chocolate today, i realised that i'm not a fan of chocolate; eg. kitkat, mars, toblerone, and etc. but i love chocolate cake &chocolote waffle (:

okay, i'm done blogging. hopefully, i wont have to experience th inability to sleep tonight. well, i might be blogging again tomorrow in th afternoon, and that will be th last post till sunday night. oh.. maybe not, monday afternoon? ah-huh.

maybe, i'm gonna accompany mummy to hospital tomorrow. oh, no chatango offline messages today, so no need to reply.

well, th bed is calling me, goodnight lovely readers. eh noo, need to wash off my makeups first. ayayai.

oh, i think i need a boyfriend. an imaginary one would be okay w me. what should i call hin? i'l think about it tonight and will tell you readers what's his name tomorrow, okay? bahaha, -.-

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-18T15:21:00.002+08:00

okay it's 2:13pm now, just woke up.

as mentioned on my previous post, i needed to wake up at 10 in th morning yesterday and yeah, mum woke me up at around 9:45am. i was so sleepy at that point of time.

mum: adikkkkkk, bangun!
me: tknk. adik nk sleep. nantuk la ibuuuu.
mum: bgn la, nk g tukar gmbr passport kan!
me: tkya tukar, muka dulu ngn skrg sama la bu. kakak tu yg kena tukar. gi ngn kakak aja k?
mum: alaa, ibu nk ajak mkn kt teh tarik la ngong. bgn!
me: kaseh tidur jam 7pagi taaaaau bu.
mum: ngong la kau, tkd org suruh tidur kul 7pagi. nanti lagi satu jam ibu kejut, bgn eh nurkaseh!

see, 'ngong' is mum's fav word -.- one hr later, i still refused to wake up. alas, i still woke up around 11 in th morning and took shower all. i am forced to, you see. i dislike whenever my sleep is being disturbed and i almost cried, you know! haahha, like omg. this reminded me of kindergarten days. i cried when i am forced to wake up. hee hee.

went 'teh tarik' at bedok. yup, just opened. somewhere near bedok library. th lady at th stall thought that i am sisAeynn's older sister. sheesh. and another thing that always happened when i'm out w my mum, strangers will tend to ask, 'is that your sis or mum?' sheeeesh, do i look so old that you people thought that mum is my sis? -.-

so anyway, th plan changed. we only had lunch at teh tarik and decided not to change th passport photo. haha. th photo could still be recognised, i hope. so yup.

went shengshiong and home sweet home. slept around 4:30pm and was waken up by mum (again!) around 6pm. get ready for math class. took 17 instead on 31, was lazy to walk to bedok interchange. baha.

saw ain gm at ite simei. woooo. sorry ain, i can't go your cheer leading competition this coming sat D:

anyway friends! my prepaid is running low. im sorry that i couldn't reply text messages. will topup next week! misses.

now, i have to take my shower and get ready for history class at bishan! sheeeesh, far. very far.

and oh, my adam not following to kl. this is so saddening. hmph.

Chatango offline messages replied!

anon4 (11:23:04 PM): calafare are Actors with small parts.. i think..hehe
reply; oh i see, hehe yeah :D

anon2 (08:43:20 PM): Nanaaa;yes waktu tu kaseh tgh tgu sesorang i tink?haha.pukul 4 plus i tink? hee (:
reply; oh hehe, betul la tu kaseh :D

anon3 (09:30:36 PM): i miss youu!
anon3 (09:30:56 PM): && yes yes , pls . i wanna meet you soon , can ? ): . reply kat my t.b . i swear imy kaseh):
reply; i miss you too, okay okay i'l reply you at your t.b meet soonest please! D:

anon1 (08:13:01 PM): Hey. I'm Anna btw yang faris nyer kawan tu. I'm your daily reader thats why.
reply; oh hi anna :D mhm, i see. thanks for reading my blog. have a nice day! ^^

anon1 (12:36:54 AM): hey babe. btw, did you do something to your hair? as in, treatment / rebonding ?
reply; mhmm, nope. i didnt do anything to my hair. haha.

anon1 (12:10:36 PM): Hey kaseh ! I saw eu at tvee . Crite Art & EL . Pretty lurh kamu !
reply; aww, thanks for th compliment, dear one :D hehe.

anon2 (12:43:15 PM): were you on suria show , art and el issit ?
reply; mhm, i think so? haha. cause i didnt watch. haha.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; i don't like 2009 and 2010 you

2010-03-17T06:37:00.005+08:00

i can't sleep, so i'm here to blog again. i decided to put random songs in my mixpod which most of th songs have got nothing to do w my life at all.

apparently, th first song; 'when i'm w you' suddenly reminds me of someone whom i thought i will never think of, never ever again. if he's reading this, i'm sure he knows that i'm referring to him.

hey you.. i swear, i am not missing you but! i miss th 2007 and 2008 you very much. if i could go back to 2007 and 2008, i would want to. no one has ever made me feel like i am th most happiest girl, but you did. th way you pampered me is what i missed th most. your love for me were so sincere and you used to make me smile all th times. your sweet messages. at times, i read back th monthsaries messages you sent me which was posted on my blog a couple of years ago. i wonder why you suddenly changed? am i th one who caused you alot of problems till you have to leave me? whatever it is, thanks for th memories. yeah, we're like strangers now and i prefer it to be that way. takecare 211107.

i found alot of sweet quotes and fall-in-love kind of songs, but i have no one to dedicate those quotes and songs to. yeah, i've said on my blog that there's no point of having a boyfriend and bla bla bla. proudly to say.. yes, i am not in love w any guy, not in contact w anyone, not dating w anyone. which means, i dont waste money and time texting, going out on a date and etc. moreover, i dont have th time, you see. like i've said on my previous posts, my time are always occupied on bed and in class. oh yeah, in th train too -.- but i hate this loneliness feelings, nevermind.. this feeling will vanish th minute i wake up from my sleep later in th afternoon.

wait eh.. i smell something nice. be right back.

okay back. burpz. perangai fattyfattybombom eh kaseh. went out of th room justnow. mum cooked fried rice. i ate and i'm full now. nicey! but it's not nice to get scolded from my fierce mummeh for not sleeping th whole night ):

i need to wake up at 10pm, need to get my passport photo changed. bah, troublesome. now, it's 20minutes to 7am. morning, lovely readers. have a nice day!

with much loves, nurkaseh ismail.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-17T04:42:00.002+08:00

this is what happened when i'm bored...... snapping pictures through webcam! -.-

it's 3:46am right now. still widely awake. reached home around 11:30pm just now. yes, very late cause my class was at yew tee yesterday. an hour in th train was very tiring. i woke up at 2 in th afternoon and ate two kuih bakar which was given by my granddaddy. yes, i ate before brushing my teeth. habit, tsk tsk. hehe. then took my shower and get ready to go out. saw mummy and her friends at bedok inter. from bedok, i trained to simei first, then trained jurong east, then to yew tee. yes, i wasted time. but th intention was to get a sit, because if i were to take train from bedok, comfirm chop double chop i have to stand throughout th journey. ah, firstime.. i clever. bleahaha.

i dropped at cck first, to find my chem book at popular but... it is still out of stock -.- i was very hungry, so i went longjohn to have my late lunch comes early dinner, yup alone. makan sorangsorang buat muka selamba, bahaha.

reached class around 7:05pm, so yeah, 5mins late. am lucky to have a nice friend, Wilkin's th name. hahaha. sat next to him and yeah, end of th day, i learnt something. thanks to him for explaining to me (:

trained to bedok and home sweet home. bah, i topup my ezlink again. in a month, i topup like 5times already. $50 burnt. sheeeesh, my money my money. i need to claim back from mum! :@

anyway, th webcam pictures was soo muka-semalam. hahaha. it's 4:14am right now. i reached home and didnt wash my make up off, which means, i didnt take my shower. that is why i called it muka-semalam. boo hoo hoo. yes, just snapped like few minutes ago. baju pun tak tukar, tak kuasa, malazZz.

then around 1plus in th morning (which was three hours ago), i was so hungry and i cooked instant prata. dad was awake and hungry too. so i made for my dad as well. i pasted egg on top of it, niceeeeey oh. then dad and i chitchatted till he fell asleep. he he he. before that, we were exploring th map. it has been so long since we last went to kl, so yup check th road names and all. now i think, th names are all stucked in my head. ha ha ha. machap la, pagoh la, kempas la, and etc, have to covered all that before reaching kl. ha ha ha -.- it's gonna be fun and happening, cause mum's bestfriend and her family will be going as well. hee hee, her sonszxz. haaaaaa, stop it eh kaseh! oh, my adam babyboy is going too. awwww, i miss him so much. he's my cousin's son but i taught him to call me 'kakak kaseh sayang' :P :P :P takmu panggil saya makcik, ok adam babyboy? kakakkasehsayang tayang adam manyakmanyak, xoxo.

post kaseh ni asyikasyik panjang gitu, menyampah la pula. baikla pembaca blog saya, setakat di sini sahaja post saya buat kali ini. semoga kita bertemu lagi di postpost yang akan datang. sambutlah salam hormat dan salam manis dari saya.

Yang benar;
Nurkaseh, anak kepada Encik Ismail Pathon.

huaaaak, surat kiriman keee haaaape kaseh? hehehehhehehehee. k la, k la, bye! ^^

Chatango Offline Messages Replied!

anon8 (09:16:32 PM): hello kaseh, your quotes seem so sad and heartbreaking :( when i read it, with the song in ur blog... made me almost cry seh! hehe.. anyways, saw you on suria! calafare eh ? hehehe ^_^
reply, aww.. dont cry, darling (: hehe. oh you saw me, but i didnt get to see myself. hmph. mhmm, what is calafare? hahaha :D

anon4 (05:32:53 PM): Heyy prettyhead. Mind telling where did you buy your tops mostly? It's all nice. (:
reply; hello there :D thanks dear one. oh, i usually buy tops at different different places. so yup, no specific place (: maybe, cotton on? bugis? fareast? this fashion? alano? hehe ^.^v

anon5 (06:17:49 PM): Kaseh kuar kat
reply; kuar kat? kat mana?

anon6 (07:45:32 PM): What show did you appeared?
reply; idk? art & el? i think so. i nvr watch tht show. haha.

anon7 (08:47:43 PM): Kika here. I saw my name! ^.^ Kaseh text Kika kay lau nak meet. Maybe next week? heh. I miss you dearest!
reply; kika syg! hehehe. yes yes, i miss you tau tau. okay, kaseh akan text kika. next week ok! *hugs*

anon2 (02:12:29 PM): kaseh blakon crite ape kat suria?
reply; it was a small role, cerita art & el. tk pasti pula btl tk nama cerita dia. haha.

anon9 (09:23:10 PM): kaseh ! kaseh !! kasehh!!! hi! *muke innocent* haha Sasha Isabelle disini ^^
reply; sasha sasha! *muka decent* hehehehe. hi hi! :D

anon3 (05:14:42 PM): thx 4 the email i dh invite u at my blog :) ( rina )
reply; most welcome, rina (:

anon1 (11:31:43 AM): Nana ; saw kaseh on 8 march at tamp inter (: & were u acting on yest suria drama art & el?
reply; oh time tu kaseh sorang tgh tunggu org eh? jam berapa? hehe. er, im not sure. i think so cause i didnt watch that drama (:

anon1 (01:13:21 AM): Kaseh. Kalau register smsyo. Then, dah activated. Then, kita msg kt number tu. Issit kena bayar, klau pakai bill ? Takut bill melambung seyy.. Kena bayar tak ? hmph.
reply, oh pakai bill. um, yupyup, kena bayar. pembayarannya sama macam hantar mesej gitu. 5cents each :D

by th way.. kenapa rambut kat gambargambar tu center parking eh? oh, sebab niari mood nk rambut macam gitu. tapi dadi (daddy) saya kata, kaseh merepek dan fail, sebab rambut center parking tak straight -.- yela yela. k da, nk tidur. sweetest dreams! (:

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; Nothing is good or bad, but th thinking makes it so.

2010-03-16T04:40:00.009+08:00

Ignorance is bliss, patience is virtue. well, i just couldn't be bothered to entertain bothersome unneeded souls.

I've made up my mind. i wanna say goodbye to yesterday and say hello to th day after today for tomorrow will always be a better day.

I've always said that i want happiness. and if i really want it, why do i always have to think about sadness? see, my mindset has changed, it's getting better now.

Now, i shall smile widely without having to force myself. life is great, and when at times, it is not, that is why it is called Life because it is full of ups and downs.

Loves and attentions from family and friends are more than enough, so i believe.. involving in relationship is never a need for now.

and a friend commented this on my facebook wall, "You only fall in love once, the rest is merely practice to make sure your heart can take it."

Well, i find it totally true. all th relationships i've gone through were just infatuations. initially, i thought that i couldn't take it but no, as you can see, i am still smiling right now. there's no such thing as 'forever'. nothing lasts and time heals everything.

It made me laugh when i reminisce about immatures guys who promised to love me forever. hilarious, much.

oh well, i've told my Dear heart to fall in love only when it is ready, and never to fall in love when it is lonely. i am only seventeen, it is th time to enjoy life to th fullest. my parents dont control me, so.. what's th point of having a boyfriend and letting him take full control of me? i got a life, you see. and th cliche reason that a boyfriend will say to his girlfriend is, "i am just protecting". like hello, my parents taught me well, i should know what is right and what is wrong. jangan macam ye ye oh nak kawalkawal anak orang, ini tak boleh, itu tak boleh. sheesh.

omg kaseeeeeeeh, macam lepaskan geram aja? padahal tak tuju kan untuk sesiapa tau and i never really had a boyfriend who totally controlled me but when i heard some of girlfriends got controlled by their boyfriends, my blood go upstairs. hahahahaha.

no, i dont hate th males. but sometimes, they are waaaay too much. well, majority of them. i repeat, majority. but i believe that one day i shall get one of th minority. may god willing.

i miss my girls; ifa lina jana tikah aisyah muny yayah, lydia kaliesa dian, ain gm, kika, tyqa aida zara nadia, meet soonest okay girls! xoxo.

it has been so long since i last met my bff, Zyzybaby. you know i miss you, and is yearning to meet you. soonest okay, and you're still and always will be remembered by me! (L)

sweethearts; cousinezzan and cousinfreda. picnic.... when? i miss th both of you so much. and one more, who's missing? ohhhhhh, sisAeynn -.- harihari nengok muka dia kat rumah, harihari cium dia satu muka, harihari tidur dengan dia. jadi, tak usah laa letak namanya kaaan, hahaha. but seriously, i wanna go out w you girls and spentime together, just th four of us. much misses.

there's night class at yew tee later at night, sheesh.

i wanna meet my girlfriends on this coming thursday. i need them so much, there's alot of catching ups to do. story-telling session and snapping of pictures are definitely a must, yippie wee.

lastly, i find it immature when one dislikes someone for no reason or for unreasonable reasons or just feel like having a dislike feelings. grow up, little brains *winks*

since i just received a chatango offline message, i shall reply it in this post, alright?

anon1 (02:49:17 AM): how do you tweet using phone? hee.
reply: oh, need to register at www.smsyo.com and read th instructions :D hehe.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwbarakatuh.

; chatango offline messages.

2010-03-16T00:52:00.000+08:00

anon1 (10:11:55 PM): KASEH! WERE YOU LIKE ON SURIA ON A MONDAY NIGHT PROGRAM? :D
reply: hahaha, omg so embarrassing :P yes, i think so, that's what my friends told me (: sadly, i missed it, didnt watch ):

anon2 (12:10:23 AM): Hello KASEH! /wave excitedly!
reply. hey hiiiiii :D *waves back excitedly* ehehehe.

yay, i reply so fast now. send me chatango offline messages before thurs and i'l reply asap. cause i'l be away to KL from friday to sunday (:

takecare, loveloves. xx.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; self-lifestory?

2010-03-15T18:12:00.001+08:00

Th quotes i found on twitter and i retweeted some of those on my twitter account. so yup, i wanna share th quotes w y'readers. enjoy :B

Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never knew.

I hate to always spare my time to just check your profile and filtering your updates.

I know we’re not 'together' anymore, but it still hurts a lot to hear about how you’ve moved on while I’m still here wishing you would miss me

I know I can't let go my past.

I know I still need you. I just want to see you happy, even if that means you’re dating someone who isn’t me.

Why can’t I feel anything from anyone other than you?

I check your profile everyday just to check that it still says "Single".

Everytime you were online, i wish you're going to greet me or just say hi to me.

The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else.

You don't know how much i've been waiting for your call or message.

I miss you and i really wish you would talk to me again.

If I never met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you, I wouldn't love you. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't miss you (therefore, i dont like 15th may)

Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.

When you are in love and you get hurt, it’s like a cut. It will heal, but there will always be a scar.

Every time a new message comes or a call, I’m hoping that it was from you.

At night, i pray that soon your face will fade away.

Everytime i try to fly, i fall without my wings. i feel so small, i guess i need you, baby.

When you smile, you're like taking my breathe away......

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; chatango offline messages

2010-03-15T17:27:00.000+08:00

Chatango offline messages replied :D

anon5 (06:42:39 PM): hey kaseh. Remember there's a girl sititng in this eating place you said? The place is called, ' The Noods'. Ad i smiled at you. I was the one duduk corner ngan faris and gang.
reply; hello there. hee, yesyes, i still remember smiling at you and th noods. youre so sweet (: oh by th way, how you found my blog :D

anon2 (09:48:02 AM): hey. where did u bought the long sleeve u were wearing on march 8, monday ? and how much? thanks stay gorgeous
reply; thanks for th compliment (: mhmm long sleeve? which one? th gray one you mean? oh that one, i cant remember cause i got it like few years back. i think it was given by my cousin, sorry (:

anon4 (12:56:32 PM): kaseh can leave ur blog mail ? im privating my blog :)
reply: callmekaseh@hotmail.com, thanks for inviting (:

anon1 (01:34:49 PM): Advertising for Walking Marionnette. Do check your mail account for updates. Thank you.
reply; ok, will check, thanks :D

anon3 (09:03:52 PM): Hey kaseh can be friends with u ? Ada msn ? I wanna be friends w you (: You are gorgeous kaseh (: My name is ninibell (: Hee!
reply: hello dear, of course can. why not? hehehe. msn kaseh ada, callmekaseh@hotmail.com/nurkaseh@hotmail.com. chat soon okay ninibell :D jaga diri! hehe.

sorry, didnt manage to catch other chatango offline messages. forgotten to save on notepad. if you have anything to say, feel free to send me an offline message at chatango okay? and i will try to reply as soon as possible (: takecare readers and have a nice day! xx.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; Updation about random stuffs

2010-03-15T07:29:00.000+08:00

Hey lovely readers, *waves*

ive changed my facebook information, i just finish eating instant prata, im tweeting about random stuffs and i have finally followed all my followers.

i have copied and pasted all my offline chatango messages on notepad but unfortunately, i accidentally close th notepad and didnt manage to save. now, i cant reply you readers' offline messages. im really sorry. if you readers dont mind and really have something to ask or say, do send me offline messages again on my chatango, okay? and im sorry for always replying late ):

i have deleted almost a thousand of my facebook friends, i am really sorry if you're one of them. i need to accept th friend requests from th ones i know. now 2000 friend requests are waiting to be accepted. my account is full, i can't accept anymore. thousand of apologies for that. do send me messages on facebook if you need to do any talkings w me, okay? i'l reply, promise! :D

by th way, it's 6:20am right now, yes i am still widely awake. nyahaha.

th night before yesterday was hilarious. i slept w daddy at living room. mom slept alone in my room and sis slept alone in th parents room. so yup, very funny laa this family, ikut sesuka hati aja nak tidur manamana. i think i wanna sleep at balcony tomorrow, hehe.. fake sahajaaa but, why not? :D

so yup, th conversations i had w my daddy were super hilarious. he was very sleepy and at that point of time, i was a disturbance to him. yes, i can be veryvery annoying at times. but, i only dare to irritate my sisAeynn and dad, but not mum, never will i irritate my mum. mummy fierce, i scared. hahaha. so my dad.. despite of him being very sleepy, he was being such a sweetheart for entertaining all my whines and ridiculousness.

so yup, i was th one who did most of th talkings and dad was there to listen to me. yup, i whined alot. i kept complaining about how stressful my life is. well, dad did gave me advices and all. thanks dad, i love you so much.

for your info, throughout our conversations, i called my dad, 'daddy' instead of 'ayah'. and dad called me, 'baby' instead of 'kaseh'. cute right, i know! *ni kes bapa layankan aja kerenah anak* hahaha. when sis and mum heard our conversations, their expressions were like.. 'daa kenapa laa dengan ni dua anak dgn bapak, dh buang tebiat?' haha.

one of th conversations i remembered..

kaseh: daddy (i pronounced as daa-di), mari kita berbual dengan menggunakan bahasa baku.
daddy: ok baby. eh salah, bahasa baku ye? ok baa-bi. baby (bey-bi) bukan bahasa baku. betul tak, baa-bi?

oh my, that is so rude okay daa-di! bleahehehee.

we talked alot, padahal nak berbual dengan menggunakan bahasa baku; melayu asli tau, entah macamana tibatiba terberbual dengan menggunakan loghat indon. berbual dengan ayah sampai ketawa terbahakbahak oi. bukan loghat indon aja, loghat cina, india semua termasuk. tak ke merepek tu, hahaha.

tibatiba dad baca satu surah ni and he asked me to guess bacaan apa itu. so yup, i guessed it right, ayat kursi. honestly speaking, i never hafal ayat kursi before, so that night i sempat hafal, but after i passed hafal satu peranggan, dad fell asleep. yes, saat mengajar tu, he actually TERtidur. hahahaha. it took me almost half an hour to memorise just one paragraph, yes just one. slowwwwwnya kaseh -.- eight more to go, haha.

today no class, best. tues got class, not best. wednesday got class, best cause its at simei, near! thursday got class, not best, very far. friday no class, im going genting at night and th next day, going kl. which means, dont have to go class on saturday. yahooooo. sunday night reach home and monday got class. and it goes on as usual.

ive not been studying, i am so doom. i have not register for th olevel papers yet, i am so double doom. i am so sleepy, i couldnt be bothered to charge my phone which th batt has already flat. i'm lazy to switch off my room's light. my lazy sickness has come already. chu meng ah.

it's 7:28am now, *yawns*

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-13T23:35:00.001+08:00

Hello loveeeeeeeely readers! :D

i was late for malay class, again! bleeeeeeeah. never on time, never came early, tsk tsk. today was th firstime i wore shoes to class. hahaha. information not needed but... i just feel like updating this on my blog. hahaha. actually im th type who is very.. how to say eh? like.. i dont care much about my looks, th way i wear. ah, something like that. im serious ok! haha. i anyhow can one. heheehe. i everytime wear slippers to everywhere, forever selekeh sey kaseh -.-

okay nevermind. oh yup, trained w najihah. seee th picture, her dimples! so cute ^.^v

i dropped at pasiris. my far relative's birthday. birthday eh? i think la. happy 17th birthday izzul! winkwink. but his birthday was on th 2nd march (as mentioned on his fb) hahahaha, i didnt talk to him. shy shy cat, me. bleahaha.

i think i ate alot today. i think im getting fatter and fatter. yay, -.- tak suka!

tomorrow's plan was supposed to go swimming w my ain glamour meow at jurong but then, th plan had to cancel. sorry ain! my mum la, ask me to accompany her for jemputan tomorroww, bleah.

i'm not going malay class next weeeeeeek. and monday has no class. yay, can hooray hooray! ^.^

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-12T15:58:00.000+08:00

Najihahhhhhh :D

Hi readers. th pictures above were taken on Wednesday, night class :D

najihah and i reached class around 7:30pm. yes, half an hour late. hehhehehe. masuk class terus lost, tatawu apa cikgu ajar. ayayaaaaai. break time was at 8pm, we were too lazy to go canteen, so we decided to just stay in class and snapped pictures. heee hee he.

someone's pen got stolen. ohh, toyol curi eh? hahahahahaha ^.^

what else to update eh?

ohhhhh, this week i only attend for math class which was on wed and maybe attending malay class tomorrow, saturday. eeee, pemalasnya kaseh -.-

oh najihah najihah, jumpa awak esok k! pergi malay class samasama, duduk ngan kita tau tau. hehe :P

oh and sisAeynn just reached home from camp. maasyallah, suaranya macam jantanzxz. comfirm chop double chop banyak pekik kat camp. ayayai. but, i miss her so much D: she reached home, pinchpinch my face, daa kenapa laa ngan kakak kaseh ni -.-

and yesterday, i webcammed w someone till 4plus, i think? then i accidentally fell asleep. sorry, you! ^.^v

hehehehheehehe.

actually, i was supposed to wake up early today and get my passport photo changed but mum changed th plan at th very last minute. haiyaaaaak.

i cant wait for next week, im going kl. shopping! ^.^v which also means, i have to skip malay class. hmph.

im gonna meet mum at bedok inter in like 15minutes time but i have yet to take my shower. sheeeeesh. i am never on time -.-

ohhhhh, i miss girlfriends and cousins! D:

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; everytime i try to fly, i fall without my wings

2010-03-11T15:10:00.001+08:00

Happy eighteenth birthday, Faris. May today be filled w sunshines and smiles, laughter and love. Hope your birthday blossoms into lots of dreams come true. Here's another year of experience, and youre not just a year older but hopefully, a year better. i'l pray that your day is special as you are. May happiness be w you, always.

Smile always and may God continues to bless you and gives you th desires of your heart.

Takecare, ~~mysterious~~ pretty boy. Goodbye.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; you were my temporary happiness and a lifetime sadness

2010-03-10T17:29:00.004+08:00

They say, if th old one doesn't go away, then th new one won't come....

for quite some times, i have always thought that being in relationship now is just not meant for me. i have always thought that it'd be embarassing if i were to say that im falling in love or say anything that has got to do w love. i dont know why. i find myself weird nowdays. it's just that i think i am waaaaay too young for all these things. it's just that i don't see th benefit of having a boyfriend now. i have always thought that having a boyfriend means that i am ready to be hurt again and also, ready to face alot of problems. i find it strange to see my friends or any strangers who get along well w their boyfriend, they look so sweet together. frankly speaking, yes im jealous to see sweet couples.

it's just so weird if i were to get into relationship. it has been so long since i last had a serious one; a relationship which lasted over a year plus. obviously, i've gotten over it. it was a couple of years ago. that was th first and th last serious relationship i have ever experienced for now. and right now, i have forgotten how to be a girlfriend, and i just find it weird if i were to involve in relationship again. well, th second relationship lasted for only two months. th reason i asked for a break up cause i couldn't forget th first one, so yup, i know that was really a dumb reason. but i have to say that both of my pasts are hot. i can still melt upon looking at their photos in my phone. hahahaha. gambar masih simpan ah, abih asal? ^^ oops, sejak bila eh kaseh berbual gini macam? so th tak kenaaaa :P hehehehehhe.

so after breaking up w th second, three months later.. i accidentally fall for someone. that was four months ago. so currently, he was th last one i have totally fallen for. up till now, he is still on my mind eventhough th lastime i contacted him was three months ago. yes, we only contacted for a month. i find it weird cause it was only a month plus, and he seemed to be permanently in my mind now. i believe that there's still misunderstadings that are yet to be explained between th both of us. but everything's over now. i have reasons for deleting him off from my facebook and blocking him on msn. around last month, i tried adding him back on facebook but i guess, he ignored me. yesterday, i unblocked him from msn and my heart was beating so fast when i saw him online but i dont have th guts to say hi.

tonight, i will be sending him a text message at 12am, that will be th last, (i hope) well, i dont know if he's still using th same number. but im not hoping for anything. th new one will come, sooner or later. i will be waiting patiently. i just want to be happy.

th weird thing about me is.. i have alot of problems when im in relationship, but i have to face more problems when im not in a relationship. ok, i know how to solve these problems. being a lesbian?! any girls interested in me? winkwink.

ok just kidding! i'm bored -.- and im feeling so down ): i want a gayboy for a bestfriend. hahaha. im serious ok!

oh, have i told you that many guys sent me messages on facebook and asked if im a lesbian or not? they said, "kesian, muka lawa tapi lesbian", "tak cukup ke lelaki kat dunia ni sampai pilih perempuan", ada yang sampai kasi nasihat, dorang kata jadi lesbian ni semua dosa dan blablabla. hahaha. omg, i knowwwwwwww ok! im straight, belum senget lagi -.-

so yup, i was supposed to go study w cousinEzzan justnow in th afternoon but my room was locked and th room key played hide and seek w me -.- and till now i cant find th key, padahal kaseh dah berhenti main hide and seek dengan kunci tu tau, shiok sendiri ah eh tu kunci main hide and seek sorangsorang -.- menyampah, hmph. i waited for grandaddy to be home till 3:30pm and now, it's 4:30pm, my door is finally unlocked. now i have to get ready for maths class, at ite simei. maaaaaaaanzxz, i'm lazy!

i didnt turn up for class last mon and tues. i was feeling so worn out, like seriously! worn out, not lazy! k, byebye.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; boo-ed, nothing is more painful than losing you and still wanting you

2010-03-09T04:36:00.003+08:00

Hello marvellous readers!

i wanna update my blog yesterday but then, i fell asleep at around 11pm. (few minutes after i reached home) i slept early rightttttttt? cant believe it gitu! woo woo.

nk update blog ni, nk mulakan dengan apa? mulakan dengan bismillah. hehehe, kan ain kan?! :D :D

okay let's start, so yesterday.. as i mentioned on my blog, i went to ite simei. i reached there around 7:15am, yes in th morning! last three weeks ago, ain called me up, asking if i could do her a favour which was to go ite simei in th morning because she had exams yesterday and needed to find someone to wash and blow th hair. so she chose me, aww, i felt so honoured gitu loh. winkwink ^^

ain reached at around 8pm. many college east students reached school at that time. i felt so awkward because i was alone. 45minutes later, ain finally reached. yay. walked into th school and went to.. i dont know what th place called. haha.

and oh, what shampoo do you use for oily hair? hahaha, not anti oily hair, k ain?! *inside story* i cant stop laughing when i think about that. omg ain, you so cute ehhhhhhhhhhhh :P hahaha.

okay currently, im chatting w ain now. she told me she has already reached. since 5pm you blogged, now then reached eh ain? kita sama, part update blog punyalah lembab! ^^ okay wait eh, im blogging now, on th waaay. kalau dah reached, i'll tell you! hahaha.

we snapped alot of pictues. i tak upload all pictures here, there's alot more on facebook :D

th pictures we took! ^^

ini kita dua punya graffiti. ah, graffiti laa sangat eh. hehehe. vandalise aja tawu, aiyo oh-hor!

okay back to th story. well.. ain, i hope you pass your exams! insyallah, ^^v

after everything's done, we went to have breakfast at... i dont know th name of th place. too many eating places at ite simei. like wow like that. omg, i sounded so jakun! college east students, dont laugh at me. hehehehe. so one of my facebook friend said that th place where ain and i ate is a high class place. hahahaha. apa sahaja :P i forgotten what i ate, but nicey and i can't finish. we were full, like totally! after eating, i asked ain, "ain, pinggan kena kasi balik kat aunty tu?" ain replied, "oh tkya tkya, ain bayar yuran sekolah" hahahaha. how i know! during secondary school days, kena angkat tau tau tau, hahahahahaha.

after that, what happened? mhmm, oh ya! we went to snapsnap pictures at stadium but after some time, we got bored sitting there. mcm sunyi sepi, tak ada orang. then we decided to go forum. wooooooooo. time tu ngantuk la agaknya, pastu kita nak segarkan mata. kalau nak kasi mata segar, kita buat apa? cuci mata! kan ain kan? hahahahaha :P ni laa ain ajar. she was late to meet me, so she asked me to segarkan mata dulu dengan mencuci mata. hehehehe.

oh yup, forum. like woooooooo. yes, bumped into quite a number of friends and familiar faces ^^

i lied many times today. but ain kata tak dosa, tipu sunat kan ain kan? hehehe. guys asked for number. i didnt give to any of them. i felt so arrogant gitu ): my alasan all like tak munasabah tau, bleah. first i said, "im attached". then to th other guy, i said, "handphone rosak". then i think got another one, i said, "tk apa la, lain kali" part handphone rosak itu ternyata memang penipu seh kasehhhhhhhh. hahahaha. then, ain had to lie also, got someone texted ain asking for my number, ain said im attached v^^v

i started blogging since two hours ago, so lembab. wait eh ain, im on th way! traffic jam! hahahahaha.

okay where were we? oh! k, then i bumped into my girlfriend, nuruljannah! misssssed her so much, please! na, meet me soon! theres alot of things i wanna share w you. i miss ifah, lina and th rest too D:

so yup, i wanted to see someone so much. ain was a sweetheart who was there to accompany me searching for him. yes, a guy. you know, some friends just couldn't be bothered. but ain is such a nice friend. AIN, TOUCHING KAN? :P hehehehheehe. so yup, we went to search for him, here and there, macam fattest hope gitu nak terserempak dia. sedih laa teramat sangat gitu kan. actaully i hate myself for being so eager to see someone. i hate being so terhengehhengeh. i have a big ego when it comes to this, i know.

so yup, went cafe one to buy a mineral water. at th same time, i was still hoping if i could bump into him or at least, see him from afar. just by seeing him from afar, that would actually make me th happiest girl for that very second.

i was queuing up at th drink stall. then i looked at my right, quite a distance away and to my surprised......... i saw him, yes him! only god knows how fast my heart beats at that point of time! and it never stop beating until i reached th bustop, waiting for th bus to pasiris.

okay back to i saw him.. so, i told ain to look where he's going cause i just dont dare to look at him. my heart was beating very fast, i had to look away eventhough i was longing to see him so much. after buying mineral water, i was told by ain to at least buy something to eat, just to pretend that we're sitting there to eat and not to look at him. so i bought pandan cake. padahal da kenyang sungguh tau.

after buying, i then bumped into my another girlfriend, nadhirah! omg, this girl.. i missed so much. then talked for two minutes like that. then... ain and i dont know where th guy went to. he's gone! ): wait.. i shall address him as mysterious boy, okay? so yup.

i was sad. then we walkwalked and yay... ain saw mysterious boy! i dont know what th place called, but it's an eating place, very small. we went inside. my heart was still dakdukdakduk-ing, i pretended not to know that he was there. so, ain and i had to buy something to eat (padahal kita dua da full, mcm totally full tau) bought french fries. i didnt look at him at all. then i heard his friends kept on calling his name, like purposely like that. heheheehehe. aiya, mysterious boy's friends, dont need to call his name, i already know he was there ^^v

i sat somewhere that i dont have to look at him. i kept on asking ain what he's doing and all cause ain was facing him. then at times, i turned behind to look at him. my heart beats so fast, i tell you. this never happened before. oh yup, i almost forgot to tell you. when his friends kept calling his name, i turned back, and looked. he smileddddddddd *melts*

after ain and i have finished eating th french fries (actually tk habis, kenyang sangat) ain and i keluar from th place. before that, got other guys saying byebye laa and blablabla. but i chose to only looked at him and gave him a smile. i dont know and dont care if he smiled back or not cause i just glanced and smiled, that's all.

then what? we walked out from th school. mysterious boy and his friends were walking out too. pergi smoke agaknya. i dont know and i dont care (:

there were so many hot guys there, but my eyes chose to look at only him. i felt contented but at th same time, i felt so dumb -.-

ain and i then bused to pasiris. snapped pictures and suddenly, ain wanted to go toilet. she had to deal w some big business there so she had no choice and left me all alone for few minutes. hahaha :/ oh before that, as we were walking, we saw this angmoh was sun tanning, lying on th grass. crazy, i guess -.- he's somewhere around 40plus, i think?

i was sitting on one of th benches. a lady who's age around 40plus was sitting on th other bench which was next to me. th moment i sat there, she immediately went to th angmoh man and said something which i couldn't hear cause it was quite a distance away, you see. then she kept looking at me tau this woman. she then came back to th place she sat and talked, at th same time, she looked at me so i supposed that she was talking to me...

crazy woman: i wont forget what he *point to th angmoh man* did to me. he made me bleed alot. he treated me badly. i wont forget what he has done to me.
me: *i pitied her and shook my head*
crazy woman: *she kept on blabering th same thing*
me: *i gave her a sincere smile*
crazy woman: dont smile, dont laugh, i dont like you!
me: *O.o*

macam out of sudden tau. i was so scared, i tell you. my heart was beating very fast, faster than th moment when i saw mysterious boy -.- i kept on talking to myself, "bila ain ni nak datang, cepat la, cepat la. kaseh takut!" kaseh macam nak nangis pun ada oi! D:

me: *i took out my phone and tweeted*.
crazy woman: go call th police, i dont fucking care. go call th police, tell th police that im crazy. i dont fucking care.
me: *didnt look at her, continued to pretend texting*
crazy woman: hey woman, i know you got a boyfriend, he will support in everything you do, go call him here, i dont fucking care! im not scared.
me: *dalam hati kaseh, merepek aja si dehni, sejak bila kaseh ada boyfriend? harapharap mulut dia masin eh, kaseh akan ada boyfriend who will support me in everything i do, haha! so yup, i didnt look at her, kept on texting*
crazy woman: hey woman, youre holding your phone, go call th police i dont fucking care. i hate you woman, i hate beautiful faces. i hate beautiful faces (and she repeated that for uncountable times)

ain finally came, walking towards me and i gave her th expression, "ain cepat".. then we walked away.

that crazy woman was still shouting, cursed me and kept on repeating, "i hate beautiful faces" i was very scareeeeeeeed, i tell you. who knows, she might come to me, slap me, beat me, throw acid at me, nau'zubillah minzalid (spelling betul tak?) seriously, i didnt do anything tau! macam tak bersalah, terus dia tak suka kaseh. nevermind, perhaps she stressed up or something ): i still couldn't forget how i felt at that moment. masyaallah. astaghfirwahalazim. sumpah stress, adui. anyway, th way she talked was somehow using matsalleh accent, but she looked chinese. so yup, i dont know and i dont care. i'm safe now, alhamdullilah. haha.
bused home. thanks ain for th day. nextime if you need anyone's hair for your exam again, i can lend you mine. ahahaha. love you! (Y)

reached home, quickly changed and met a friend at tampines. ariel's th name. sorry ariel for coming 45 minutes late. yes, it was a very last minute plan. he's a nice guy, i should say. so yup, had a nice time talking w him and th part i most like about him is.. he talked alot about religious stuffs. around 7plus, hamka came. hamka is ariel's twin brother. so yup, this reminds me of khairunizam and khairuazam. hahaha. speaking of which, it has been so long since i last heard from nizam. ijam, mana hilang? bleaaah. anyway ariel, thanks for th meet up :D

i saw my babyboy. chey, no. i saw fie. hahaha. yes, th guy i promoted on my blog, shafiran! winkwink. hahaha. i heard th day after i blogged about him, many girls add him on facebook eh? minat fie ehhh? :P dia memang goodlooking ^^ i texted him and met him for awhile. talktalked, and around 20minutes later, his friend came and then, i trained home. fie, let's meet again nextime okay! :D

i had to go home early cause i told mum i didnt attend english class. i was so tired k please. th main intention of going tamp was to find books at popular but... no stock ): actually, i had th intention to lie to mum that im out to night class but.... i dont feel good, i felt like one bad daughter if i lie. seriously tau, perasaannya macam bersalah sangat. haha, kental :P so i told mum th truth. sekentalkental kaseh, tetap, that's a good thing right? hehe.

th night before, i only had two hours of sleep, that was th reason why i felt so worn out. th moment i reacheh home, i couldn't be bothered to wash off my make ups, i changed my clothes, went to bed and kebabom, fell asleep around 11pm. for th firstime (after so long) i slept early. hehehehhee.

now it's past midnight, haha! lama or what i blog. hehe. i need to wake up early tomorrow, heading to tamp to study w cousinEzzan. she's a math genius you know, she got a1 for olevels maths. and grade a* for psle maths. i wonder how she did that, ayayai. i jealous tau D:

anyway, mysterious guy is in love w someone else. all th best, may god bless you, pretty boy (:

goodnight lovely readers, thanks for reading my blog. dont forget to visit Ain's blog too okay? :D

http://glamourmeow.blogspot.com

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-08T05:28:00.002+08:00

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii :D

saturday, i was late for malay class. 1:10pm, i was still at home, eating. sadly, i could only have a forkful of mee goreng cause it hurts my ulcer. im having ulcers again, two ulcers. irritating, much! i cried when i was eating. i cried when i was brushing my teeth ):

reached bedok mrt station around 1:40pm and reached bishan around 2:10pm. reached class around 2:25pm. 25minutes late! my hair was so messy, face was so oily and th surroundings were really hot. i had to endure. i dont like ite bishan. hahaha.

i was so sleeeeeepy, i tell you. i reached home, i didnt change but i only took out my cardigan and went to my bed. kebabom, i slept for two solid hours. only two hours, not enough! dad woke me up cause it's already maghrib. but actually, i refused to wake up. hehehe. but, few minutes after dad tried to wake me up, sis then woke me up and asked me out.... i immediately woke up. it's very rare to be asked out by sisAeynn, you know! haha.

i woke up and changed. tak mandi oi! hehehe. make up pun tadi tengahari punya -.- trained to changi airport. i was wondering why there were alot of people there. wait.. i'l get back to this later, k! so yup, walkwalked at airport. then went to have my dinner at mcd. seriously, my tummy was krakruk-ing inside. was famished, like th veryvery you know. ayayai. as soon as we reached mcd, i immediately went to order mc spicy, upsized! wooooo, i dont care about my ulcers and ate. but of course, there were tears rolling down my cheeks. th ulcers are very painful, ok! i dont want to cry, but... bleah boo.

so yup, sis's bestfriend, haqim, came. he told th both of us that there were so many people cause... wondergirls came to singapore. hahaha comfirm ramai orang berpusu-pusu nak bergambar dengan tu semua wondergirls.. hahaha, da minat kan, da kemaruk sangat -.-

so yup, roamed at airport, snapped pictures. bused home.

bloated tummy, i got. mc spicy di dalam perut! -.- diet soonest. must must must! :S

things are getting better, alhamdullilah. now, i'm having another problem. how am i going to solve? will update about this soon.

it's 5:18am now. monday, english class! oh my. i havent do my compositon. nevermind, will submit next week. i need to take a shower soon, need to reach ite simei by 7:30am. meeting ain glamourmeow! ^^

oh yesterday, parents, sis and i were out to grandmama's house. were we there from 2pm to 8pm. didnt do much things there, just played w th cute toddlers. after which, had dinner w th family at jalan kayu! yay! i ordered prata cheese and prata chocolate. so i was eating.. and then, sisAeynn's food came. prata icecream, i swear i was jealous!!!!!!! hmph hmph.

i think i'm going to give chem class a miss on this coming tuesday. this week very tiring. eventhough my class is at night, im still lacking of sleep. i think after meeting ain glamourmeow at ite simei later, i wanna go home and sleep. then in th evening, need to come ite simei again. balik rumah terus comfirm chopchop, kebabom, mimpi indah.

k daaaaaaa, morning!

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-06T05:15:00.004+08:00

Life has not been treating me well, too many things are saddening me. it's not that i'm not thankful, but th fact is, i got a boring life. i see myself less smiling nowdays. i want happiness but when i am asked what is th happiness i am searching for, my mind went blank and i dont have th answer for th question.

nowdays, i see myself being neglected and lacked of love. my problems are mostly kept to myself. i wanna spend more time w my family, cousins and friends. ive always thought that they dont have th time for me, but fact is, it's th other way round. i didnt realise that actually, i am th one who is always busy.

busy? i seldom go out, i seldom spend my time outside. okay no, that's not true. i've been spending most of my time in th train, class and beddddddd -.- i sleep alot, that makes me more lazier. after sleeping more than 10hours, i am still yawning for umpteen times in class. weird, like totally! i need vitamins, any recommendation? gah.

so anyway, last week, tuesday was my chemistry class. i dont like how th schedule was fixed. th teacher will be teaching chemistry till th end of whole chapters and then, she will be teaching biology. why cant every week, she teaches biology and chemistry alternately? same goes to social studies and history too. it will easier that way right? dullard!

wednesday was maths class, at ite simei. too many things were on my mind on that very day. hoping not to bump into unnecessary souls, am trying not to worsen th problem. but woefully to say, things got exasperated and ive decided not to run away from it, i did tried to solve th problems but i dont know if what i did was right or wrong. i am th main problem, but all these things happened due to misunderstanding. if assumptions and accusations didnt betide in th first place, these unwanted things will never happen. or perhaps, if my parents didnt force me to take night classes, i wouldn't have to feel so bad and guilty. nevermind, i am already immune to th problem im facing right now, but i couldn't tolerate anymore. my name goes bad and people will start spreading untrue rumours about me. sometimes i wonder, why can't some people differentiate th meaning of flirting and being friendly. for goodness sake, coquetting and amalgamating are two dissimilar things. haish. anyway, my friend, Najihah was absent. i was grateful that i got a friend who sat next to me during maths class, Farid's th name and we spent our break time together. and also, thanks to him for walking me to th busstop and waited till my bus came (:

thursday was history class, at ite bishan. my friend was there, Riyah's th name. and i got a new friend, farhan's th name. so yup, spent my break time w th both of them. nothing really absorbed in my head, i dont know why, i was so sleepy at that point of time. i was so elated when class finally ended. riyah bused home and farhan walked w me to th train. i reached home around 11:15pm and mum immediately hugged me and said, 'alhamdullilah anak aku da balik'. i looked at mum and gave her th, 'what's w you, mum?!' expression. hahaha, she was totally worried cause my class was at bishan and my prepaid has no credit, left w zero cents. so yup, she couldn't reached me. she's so cute when she's worried. i was touched and i realised that there's no mum who dont love her children. i asked her an irritating question, "oh, ibu sayang kaseh eh?" and she replied th same answer whenever i asked that question, "sayang la, kau anak aku, aku beranakkan kau sembilan bulan sembilan hari. bukan beranak biasa, aku operation kau tawu tak kaseh?" dad laughed at mum and said, "ibu ni tk habishabis, asyik jawab yang sama aja" and then mum showed her frustrated expression. cute or what my mummy, hehehe.

and yesterday, which was friday, no class. i slept till 4pm. th night before i didnt sleep, i spent my time chatting w one of my classmate in malay class. oh yup, have i updated that four classmates of mine in malay class are coincidentally my facebook friends? i was so shocked. at first, i dont know that they're my facebook friends till i was told by them. hehehe. chatting w this classmate of mine makes my stomach cramped due to too much of laughing, thanks ehhhhh. kabluek. haha! it's very coincidence cause this classmate of mine is th brother of someone whom i am currently contacting w (sometimes) so yup, i slept at around 7am and woke up at 10am. i didnt took any shower, and went down w my smelly face to meet my girlf, Jannah to pass her something. so yup, had a nice chat w her. bbbbb, meet me again soon okay, w th rest! i miss my girlfriends very much D: then slept back around 11am and woke up at 4:30pm. i ate alot today, fatty fatty me D:

now, it's 4:56am and i need to force myself to sleep now. i got malay class later at 2pm but i have to go out early cause i need to purchase some books. bah, so troublesome. hopefully i could wake up early and wont come to class late again like last week. th only reason why i wanna come early is because.. i wanna sit infront. nak jadi teachers' pet...... not! gila ke hape jadi teachers' pet, hahaha. kentalzxz. i have a very poor eyesight and i dont know why, i just dont like wearing contact lens now, it's so killing my eyes! gaaaaah.

sunday, im going to my grandmama's house. i miss her. haha. and im looking forward on this coming 19th, i'm going kl, babyyyy. hopefully i get to bump into my handsome malaysian facebook friends, hehehe. miang nyaaa kaseh -.- oh, shopping! ^^ going w family and mum's friend's family, yippie yay!

my phone's batt is flat since justnow. comfirm chop double chop got unreplied messages. ayayai. tomorrow i charge then i reply laa horr. hee hee. takecare, xoxo.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-05T17:14:00.003+08:00

Hello lovely readers :D

Last three days ago, my cousin, Freda, slept over my place for a night. yay, which means, my sleepless night was accompanied by dear Her (Y) before tuesday, it has been almost half a year since i last seen her, i missed her real much! fredaaaaa, next weeek overnight at my place again, otey b? wheehee.

oh, i miss my cousinEzzan too, i cant remember when was th lastime i met her. three months ago, eh zan eh? see, i cant remember. much misses! ): let's have cousins day out, soonest please? picnic jom jom jom? ^.^v

so yup, webcammed w freda. hahaha, look at my fugly plain face! i look oh-so-atrocious!

this girl ehhhhhh, pervert as always!

ni kes tengah tak ada kerja la kaaan -.-

actionaction gigi jongang, hehehe. lawa laa tuh -.-

hahhaha, freda! cute nya u! ^^

ah, cantik laa tu, cantik sangat -.-

look what she did to my face! aiyoyo.

see, what she did to my face again! mcm baru kena punch! huahua.

so yup, slept around 7 in th morning and woke up aroun 2plus in th afternoon. th pictures below, sumpah baru bangun tidur. muka bhusyuk eh! hehahu. bleah boo.

smile w your eyes, hahaha.

thanks to freda, now i'm addicted to my blog song; kekasih tidak dianggap. ayayai.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; au revoir

2010-03-03T05:48:00.000+08:00

Imran Ajmain - Selamat Ulang Tahun Sayang

Yang tulus ikhlas
Ingin sekali sekala dirinya dibalas
Walau hanya dengan dakapan di angin lalu

Yang selalu memberi
Ingin sekali sekala jadi penerima
Cukup dengan salam dan manis doa

Aku ingin kau merasakan hebatnya cinta
Dan leburkan saja serpihan calar derita

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Kini kau bersayap, pergilah terbang
Rentaslah langit cita cita mu
Harap nanti kita ‘kan bertemu

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Janganlah engkau tak terbang pulang
Ku nanti penuh kerinduan
Selamat tinggal, selamat jalan

Aku hanya inginkan engkau setia
Kerana setia yang mencipta bahagiamu

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-03-02T04:35:00.002+08:00

hello readers! it's 4:02am and i am still widely awake -.- i wanna sleep right after i finish blogging! so here it goes, a quick one!

yesterday, monday, i was having english class at ite simei. and i got a new classmate, a guy. ah, cuteeee ^^

before that, i trained to simei instead of taking th bus cause i need to buy books at popular but unfortunately, th books were out of stock. sadded :/

someone's going to accompany me to lot1 popular tomorrow, awwwww. heeheehe :P why lot1 eh? oh! cause i got class at yew tee tomorrow! yes, very tiring! D:

oh yup, back to simei. then from simei mrt, i have to walk to ite simei. quite far ehhhh? heee hee he, pemalas nya kaseh ^^ oh then.. i realised i was walking w this guy.. first he was walking behind me, then i walked behind him, then.. we were walking next to each other, then he walked infront of me.. then, we reached ite simei together. hehehe. then.. he's gone. (information not needed -.-)

then what else eh nak update? oh yup! febuary babies! on th 24th; happy birthday to my dearest yayahbeloh and on th 28th; happy birthday to my dearest munirah! love you girls, xoxo.

lastly.. i dont go for attached guys, please. in two months, i dont know how many times already i got accused of being interested w attached guys -.- gugugaga-ing over guys till wanna involve in relationship is just not me for now. i'd prefer liking someone in just a short period of time. get what i mean? wait, those who owns a facebook account.. have you came across a fan page, "i temporarily fall in love in public transport" yup, something like that. yup, that is so me. hahaha. kentalnya gwe. i wanna join that fanpage but sadly, my facebook account is full ):

i wanna sleepsleep, tata. nightnight. muahmuah. i dont like tues! byebye! ^^

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-28T20:24:00.004+08:00

th sweet girl next to me is Najihah, my classmate for maths and malay class (:

i did tweeted that i was late for malay class yesterday. well, it's at bishan and it starts at 2pm every saturday. i went out from home at around 1:15pm and so that was th reason why i was late. class kat bishan, tinggal kat bedok abih keluar rumah kul 1:15pm. from bishan inter to ite bishan took me 15mins to walk, gaaah. i slept late yesterday, i only had 4hours of sleep ):

class ended at 5pm. trained w Najihah, she dropped at bugis and i dropped at pasiris. i went to meet my sisAeynn. initial plan was to study but no, nothing really absorbed in my head. sisAeynn did studied and me? i laid my head on th table and fell asleeeep. zZzz.

i ate alot todaaaaaay. im currently craving for donutsss! i changed my mind of wanting to diet and losing 5kgs. it will never happen! you know why? my family wont understand! everytime i wake up, when mum's not at home, grandaddy will buy breakfast for me. breakfast ialah nasiiii, banyak pula tuh. bukan nasi aja, got kuihkuih jugaaa :O then when mum's home, she'll cook delicious foods. makanan semua kes mengemukkan ):

how to lose weight, you tell me? after night class, i'l bus home and drop at interchange. to go home, i have to walk pass mcd. you see laa, macam tempting kan nengok mcd! then i will have th urge to buy twister fries and mc chickeeeen D:

i get stress up very easily and when i'm stress, i tend to eat alot. seeeeeee, i can never lose weight. asyikasyik gain aja, benciiiiiiiiiiii tawu tak? D:

ah, i havent do my english homework yet! tomorrow is english class and it's at ite simei. ah, ezlink has no credit liao, ergh. bukubuku belum beli. menyusahkan hidup orang laaa ni semua. da la, bye.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-28T17:07:00.001+08:00

hiii, i shall now update about last friday! ;D

well, i was out w my sisAeynn on that very day and wooooo, i went shopping at cotton on. spent almost a hundred there and obviously.. i'm... about to be cashless soon. have to wait till 5th to receive kachingzzz from mummeh );

i just realised that parkway has changed alot. like wow gitu. and cotton on is way bigger now compared to th previous one, fastfood restaurants is combined, very nice gitu.

what else? oh yup, after shopping at parkway cotton on and had lunch at kfc, we then bused to tampines. went to popular, i wanna buy that boook, cost $48. mahaaaaal but it looks interesting. ayayaaai.

then went to isetan, eh got sale! like wow gitu kan, and then went cotton on and guess what? i shopped again. th feeling was like, is-a-must-to-buy. haha. and i want that denim jacket at cotton on parkway, $59! ); i wanttttttttttt.

then headed to tamp one rooftop and camwhored :B i love my kakak, thanks for th day, sisAeynn (Y)

more pictures at facebook. pssssst, im not in th mood now, bah. bye.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-28T04:17:00.005+08:00

Thursday was a very tiring day cause i had to wake up early, 7am. i only had 2hours of sleep before waking up that early, you know! then had to go arab st, umar drove me there. reached there around 9plus, and then, they did th shootings and all. my part was to be umar's new girlfriend, yup that's all. had to do th handsign. eh wait, not handsign, it's called th 'piakings'. hahahaha.

i was homed by few minutes to 2pm. cheched facebook, replied facebook comments, and then.. packed my bag and out, trained to bishan. lunched at kfc alone. a chinese man shared table w me since kfc was packed at that point of time so yup, i gave him th permission and obviously, i was eating and macam tak kena gaya gitu but i just kept myself cool and makan dengan muka selamba. oh, and he asked if i'm local or not? -.-

i managed to go ite bishan, tk sesat, yay kan! mhmm, saw quite a number of familiar faces there. oh, i reached there very early, around 5:30pm. daa kenapa gitu kaaaaaan, awal naah -.-

history class, woah many old people eh! around 40plus going 50 gitu th age, ayayai. i sat next to an apek, baha. i talktalked w him during break time. hahaha. oh yup, i got a nice classmate for history class too, Riah's th name (:

history classssssss, nothing absorbed on my head cause i was totally sleepy and fatigued.

trained to bedok and i saw a tall guy, yup he's goodlooking.. so yup, i did glanced at him. guess what? he realised. okay, about he realising was th climax, bleah. kaykay let's start all over again. so this guy boarded th train from bugis. he was standing next to me and i looked at him through th reflection. then reached bedok, he dropped at bedok too. so we went down th escalator together and he talked to me, yes he did. i was like.... er? hahha, lost of words gitu.

him: mhm, are you kaseh?
me: er, yes. how you know me?

and th conversation went on. he told me that i was his msn friend and th lastime we chatted was like two years ago. wooo. alamum, kaseh pernah chat dengan si tinggi handsome ni rupanyaaaaaaaaa, two years ago oi, mana kaseh ingaaaat lagi -.-

i was wondering how he still remembers me, so i asked and his replied was.... secret! hehe, i was so touched, dont want to tell la :P and yup, walked home w him, took a longer route. suddenly, he felt so tired and decided to cabbed me home. padahal dekat aja tau, ^^ he's staying somewhere around bedok too, so yup.. my day was tiring but still, i did smiled at th end of th day (:

oh yup, he asked... "were you looking at me justnow? i saw through reflection tau!" hahhahaha.

reached home and went lalaland :B

i'l update about friday and saturday soon, perhaps tomorrow. i cannot tahan already, my eye painpain. i want to sleepsleep, nak go lalaland and dreamdream. nightnight, loveloves.

below: th shiok sendiri pictures before i was out from homeeee, lihat laaa. bahaa.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-28T03:07:00.000+08:00

Hi, i know i've not been updating my blog, it's getting mundane. well, i've been very busy nowdays. night classes are tiring me, and i've not been sleeping well. currently, i'm on red month (moodswings), pimples make me feel really ugly, tembel on th right eye is killing me, and studies make me stresssssss. i can't study, i feel like giving up! erghhhhhhhhhhh.

oh well, i haven't update about my first day of math class right? well, it's much better than english and chem class. woo. cause i got classmate who talked to me! a nice sweet girl, Najihah's th name (:

during break time, i went to th canteen alone and when i was exiting th lift, i saw a good-looking guy. finally, there's a good-looking guy at night class but th sad thing is, he's not th same class as me. grr, i should have chosen english class on wednesday instead of monday! bleahahaha.

and oh, i saw Ain glamourmeow at ite Simei! yaaaaaay, missed her much.

okay, that's all for wednesday! will update about thursday on th next post, stay tune! ^^

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-24T03:17:00.012+08:00

Hi! *waves* v^.^v

first day travelling to yew tee for night class was really exhausting. out from home at 4:30pm, reached yew tee around 6pm. met lydiababy to have lunch at mcd. yummeh. kaliesasyg! lydia and kaseh missssss you manymany taau, bila nak meet?! D: text me soon otey b? ^^ nextime kita tiga meet kat yew tee otey? lagipun yishun nan yew tee kan tak jauh ^^

reached class at 7pm, woah quite a number of girls in th class and only two chinese guys -.-

tomorrow math class, not really looking forward. cause eng and chem/bio classmates were.... er, disappointing? no one talks to me, i was all alone D: can i have nice classmates at math class? also for hist/ss and malay too? *pray hard*

nextweek, i wanna be th one making th first move by talking to my classmates at eng class and chem/bio class! ^^

and bleah, i needa buy books! and oooh, i got english homework -.-

chem chapter one seems easy. for th firstime im saying this.. comparing first day of chem class and eng class.. chem is much more easier than eng. english is veh veh difficult, why? :O

reached bedok at 11pm, walked home and i saw sisAeynn and her friends at voideck.. er, studying eh? yup. anddddddd, i was so shocked when i saw someone :P winkwink.

thursday class at ite bishan and i have no idea how to go there -.-

oh i have something to share w you readers! i was in th train justnow. there's this guy sitting opposite me. i did glanced at him, that's all. i yawned. two seconds later, he also yawned. then i yawned again, then his turn to yawn. and it kept on repeating for a few times. very funny, i had a difficult time controlling my laughter you know! oh my, ahahaha. imagine eh if i couldn't control my laughter, then smilesmile/gigglegiggle alone.. macam mentelmiangtingtongsiao gitu eh, bahaha.

oh yaaaaa, my life is sucha bore you know! night class or no night class, still th same -.- you know why? everyday routine: sleep late, wake up at 3pm. take shower. go for three hours of night class. that's all. initially, i thought night class is great but!.. macam tak interesting gitu. its like, i sleep at 6am, then wake up at 3pm. take shower, eat, kedebak kedebuk, go night class. secondary school at least something tau, like for example, i go to school in th morning then school ends in th afternoon then after school can go jalanjalan. then night class pula? i wasted my time sleeping th in afternoon -.- it's diffcult to change my sleeping time D: mcm sekarang, it's 3:37am already, im still widely awake, hmph. naak sleeping pills! then every saturday pula got malay class, 2pm to 5pm. ask me out tau on saturday, fetch me from ite bishan jam 5ptg then kita go jalanjalan or something? ahahha, tatawu malu nyaa kaseeeeeeeeh. :P

oh, every friday no class. what's th plan for this friday? mhm, GIRLFRIENDS, JADI TAK JUMPA? RINDU, TAWU TAK? D:

every night i go to th toilet to wash off my make ups. then i spit out.. i see bloooods, disgusting know! everytime i tell my parents about this.. both will say... "oooooh panas, bnykbnyk minum air suam k?" gitu aja? its throat bleeding ok, not lip or mouth injury! hmph. but kan kan kan, there's bloods only after i wash my face. ada kena mengena tk? ahaha, mana ada link gitu kan. pe je, pe je, boo. oh, i got bleeding gums too, apa niiiiiii ):

kay la kay la.. tata, pai pai ^^

assalamua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; suddenly, i felt nothing

2010-02-23T05:11:00.001+08:00

LONELYYYYY, ME! ):

Malam ini, ku sendiri, tak ada yang menemani,
seperti malammalam, yang sudahsudah

Hati ini selalu sepi, tak ada yang menghiasi,
seperti cinta ini, yang selalu pupus

Tuhan kirimkanlah aku, kekasih yang baik hati,
yang mencintai aku, apa adanya

Mawar ini semakin layu, tak ada yang memiliki,
seperti aku ini, semakin pupus

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-23T03:35:00.003+08:00

Chatango offline messages replied! linked and relinked! ^.^

anon1 (12:22:15 PM): kaseh. kaseh menggunakan eyeliner brand apa

reply: oh, brand silkygirl :D

anon2 (05:11:52 PM): i'm just a passer-by. Interesting blog! Heh :)

reply: ehehe, thanks thanks ;D

anon1 (11:00:50 PM): kaseh kaseh. where did you buy your checked blouse mcm esmeth nyer?

reply: oh you know him? mhm, th baju i wore.. that's not mine, my sister's (:

anon2 (05:08:48 AM): Hahaha! Kaseh pon tawu bobal boyan? Cool!

reply, tawoweh! haha, oh itu perbualan boyan eh? kaseh baru tawu! hahha ^.^

anon3 (10:37:47 AM): I love the post on 20th february about relationships and friends. \:

reply: oh, thanks (: th post.. i was just letting out my feelings (:

anon4 (11:44:07 PM): hello kaseh! =D this is tisha. rmbr, u once tagged my blog? u said u love reading my blog? hehs. well, i've link you. link me back yeah?

reply: hi tisha, i tagged you before? oh okie, i'l link you up ^.^ thanks for linking me, ehe!

anon1 (06:24:56 AM): Kaseh , visit me.. partandparcelofdesiredlife.blogspot.com.. :))

reply: alright, will visit you. will leave you a tag ;D

anon3 (08:00:31 PM): KIKA HERE! heh. I love you and miss you a lot! text me sooooon!! ((:

reply: KIKA LOVE! texted already, miss you tau tau tau. much loves, *hugs*

anon2 (07:10:57 PM): visit us for great deals on imported dresses and sprees at low prices! www.chiffoncandy.miyoc.com

reply: will visit :D

anon4 (01:33:34 PM): no-controversy.blogspot.com do visit us whenever ure free. :)

reply: will visit :D

anon1 (09:16:09 AM): hi kaseh. mane kaseh beli baju maxi dress eh? & how much roughly cost? email me instead can since i wont be at ur site often? n.for.nurul@gmail.com Thanks!

reply: mhm, im sorry that i can't reply you through email. really sorry! maxi dress? uhm, mostly at this fashion (:

anon1 (01:49:53 AM): kaseh dulu kaseh ada mention kaseh buat rambut pat bedok which is v cheap kan? Sebelah mana eh?

reply: oh yup, that shop, very cheap :D di blk 418, nama kedai, 'yuan yuan' :D

anon1 (02:54:17 PM): hi there ab here see...cn lyke get to noe cha..text me rite...*your number*

reply: errrr, hi. do add me up on msn, nurkaseh@hotmail. can get to know me thru there (:

anon1 (10:50:27 PM): im done linking you up already (:

reply: oh thanks! :D

anon2 (04:05:01 PM): Hey dolls! Get your cheap and classy apparels here! Spree closing soon. Prices capped at $!9 only. http://prettycheapdeals.blogspot.com/ please support :)

reply: alright, will visit :D

anon1 (02:41:38 PM): guest: kaseh beli long dress kat mane? very nice, i like! ^^ ouh n btw u hav ur own life. let them say wat they want n they hav no right to stop u. ure responsible for your own life. stay strong okay! :)

reply: thanks dear one, i will stay strong! :D mhmm, long dress.. mostly kat this fashion ^^

anon5 (01:33:54 PM): hello . maner awak buat rambut awak time national day..

reply: mhmm, kat bedok north ave 2 blk 418, nama kedai 'yuan yuan' :D

anon1 (10:13:11 PM): OMG! I agreed with ur post on e 27th Jan, wednesday. I love the picture saying 'no matter .. ' Anyway, stay strong, stay b.e.a.u.tiful, stay sweet! Live life, aza aza fighting! (:

reply: yes, i find it true too :D will stay strong, thanks dear one :D

anon3 (06:53:15 PM): hello Kaseh. :D i know you've heard this a million times before but allow me to add on to it.. you're very pretty. (: - fxzakxtten.

reply: aww, fxzakxtten, youre much more prettier. hehehe :D

anon2 (08:35:28 PM): kaseh! kaseh tau tak , i dream that you became my kakak leh .(i also tktau why i dream about you) and than you sent me to school everyday . hehe , i know my dream weird gitu lor . HAHA! :D but , kaseh lawa gile la . and i'm your daily readers. hooho^^

reply: hahaha, cute nya awaaaaak ^.^ terimakasih atas pujian tu, tapi mana ada kaseh lawa gila. tipu kan ni? :P

anon4 (07:23:13 PM): Hello kaseh:) Mind link ahyeen? Http://getalifesuckers.blogspot.com.

reply: okay, kaseh akan link :D

anon1 (09:21:57 AM): ila-i saw you smlm at bhg with your friends! haha . i work there (:

reply: oh youre working at bhg, i see. hehee. hope to see you again :D :D

anon4 (09:22:13 PM): ehk, y u link me so bnyk ? hees. just link me yg nie aje k. ihateyourguts.onsugar.com, yg laen bulehh delete (: ;yati

reply: was confused. hehe, kay all deleted and relinked! :D

anon5 (09:11:57 AM): kaseh, u pernah trun amk polyclinic tak? =) -laydiezee

reply: tk pernah (:

dearaydaa (02:23:19 PM): kaseh , sorryy to trouble u . my new link www.aydaahamasaki.blogspot.com . yg lame nye i lupe pass so cant go in anymore . saad tc pretty ;D

umm, okay okay nervermind. will link you again :D

anon2 (05:31:03 PM): Hi kaseh, awak sungguh cantik sekali and jgn sedih2 nanti cepat tua tau and senyum selalu . awak ambil course apa di ite? if you don mind to tell and here's the guide for you to stay more strong and stronger.

reply: aww, thanks lovely. hehe. saya tak akan sedihsedih selalu kay :P mhmm, saya tk sekolah di ite, tk ambil apa apa course pun :D thanks for th website, it helps alot :D

anon9 (05:10:18 PM): hello . the 20th post , the guy is hasif kaaaan ? :/

reply: yupyup :D your ex schoolmate kan? ^^

sweet ! We are new and thought you might want to have a visit at our blogshop. Please support us ! Thank you! getyoursonly.blogspot.com

reply: will visit :D

anon7 (06:55:58 PM): heY2..cN i geT to noE eu?aPiz here...

anon7 (06:56:27 PM): hmm ,, if cn give me ur num...

reply: get to know me? sure, why not. do add me up on msn? (:

anon6 (08:17:37 AM): kaseh , eu tking night classes kt simei ? haha . too bad cnnt meet ~

reply: mhmm, why cannot meet pula? kaseh tk schl kat situ pun, tetap boleh meet manamana. haha, wait. siapa tuh? ^^v

anon1 (05:19:10 PM): fadd here. relink aye. http://mylifestory-fadd.blogspot.com/

reply: hee, okay relinked! :D

anon4 (02:21:00 AM): www.breakbeatjizzhut.tumblr.com link me! aiman. (:

reply: hi kacak, da linked da :D :D

anon3 (06:00:28 PM): hope kaseh follow this step how to heal your hurt and yea i'm sure one day you will find your prince who truely love you and make you happy:) tc.

reply: awww, thanks alot! i hope so too, i'm still waiting for my prince to come, ehehe. be happy, tc too ^^

anon5 (08:14:48 AM): Hey jambu!(: you got into ite simei ehk? me too. haha. but you start quite early. mine maybe around april month, i guess. ha ha ^^, see you around? -Shikin Lee.

reply: yo cantik! :D oh, youre schooling there full time right? i'm taking partime class there, but its night class :D i'm still struggling w math, eng, and other boring subjs. ehe.

anon4 (12:24:13 AM): Kaseh. Help me. Camne nak letak nuffnang kat blog? i da add ads tp tkle. help me, pls. my blog is: http://babyboifyee-iloveyou.blogspot.com/ . THANKS :)

reply: hi hi :D mhmm, maaf kaseh reply lewat ni chatango message. by now, comfirm daa letak ads kan? kalau belum, gi copy ads kt nuffnang, paste aja kat blognya template :D

anon1 (05:13:12 PM): yg nuffnang tu nk click ape ehkkk?? so we get paaid??

reply: it's when your readers click th ads on your blog :D

anon3 (07:34:02 PM): u love me?? sure ke nie? or nak sedapkn ati je?? ehehe. klu gitu, i pun love u la. way more than u do. hee. u tkcr tau. & im not cute. i biase je. u yg cute+lovely+awesomeness gorgeous skali!!!! [zyzy]

reply: of course i love you :D you ni ada ada aja tau, ehehehe. takecare juga ye ^^v

anon2 (07:31:13 PM): Ezza - hello kaseh, makin lawaaa eh kaseh nie :D

reply: ehehe, eleh. ezza tu yg makin lawa. hehehe :P

anon2 (04:55:02 PM): hello kaseh . awak chatique arh , nk tanyerh , awak braperh tinggi ?

reply: soalan awak cute. comfirm awak pun cute kan? :P ehe. mhmm, saya tk tinggi. 158cm sahaja ^^v

anon4 (10:00:01 PM): Nadiah : Bby, biler mau meet? :)

reply: youre schling in th morning, i'm schling at night. susah nk meet. i miss you ): do text me sometimes ok! :D

anon3 (12:33:42 AM): iLah Aryadne: syabilla here! relink me yeah? http://oneandonly-ilaharyadne.blogspot.com . ty babe (:

reply: hi, ehe. you're relinked! most welcome ^^v

liyanaizzati (02:41:07 PM): hye kasehgoodgirl,,how is ur life? Good?

reply: hi liyanaizzati. life's okay okay la, as per normal. yours? :D

anon1 (10:16:50 PM): Adilah ; I put my nuffnang board alr. like how'd u did here at ur blog - the flower2 thing. hehehe. and then what? people have to click on it? that's all? ape lagi, click on adilah punya nuffnang board lah. ok? thankyou. i picit on urs also ok? hehehe

reply: hehehe, ok ok :D mhmmm, yg flower flower eh? amik code kat nuffnang, letak aja kat blog template :D hehehe. wheee.

anon2 (12:18:54 AM): sehaa ; heeeh , tuh lah . sehaa naak sngt seyh terserempak with kaseh ): now sehaa dah okay , heeeh :D

reply: insyallah kita akan terserempak suatu hari nanti, eheeheh :P

minniejepon (05:33:25 PM): kaseh love.. im sure i saw u tat day at kfc.. hahax..

hellohello love :D kfc? oh itu time dh lama eh? ehe, harap terserempk lagi :P

anon1 (11:07:35 PM): Helo Kak , nice to meet you , anyw wats ure email ? rpy me bac at my blog : ayuthoneandoni.blogspot.com k (: hhehe

reply: nanti akak go visit your blog k? mhmm, my email is callmekaseh@hotmail.com :D nice meeting you too ^^

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; first day of night class; eng lesson!

2010-02-22T23:39:00.000+08:00

reached ite simei at 6pm, got to know that th registration only starts at 7 -.- luckily i woke up late, or else i come to school at 4? phew. i was all alone ); but! i feel so independant today ^.^ english class...... i was th only malay girl. lonely. no one sits next to me. and that's all. borrrrrrrrrrring.

i waited more than an hour for my turn to register. it then took me 15mins to find th class. and i was alone all along, very pathetic. class starts at 7pm, and i came at 8:30pm, syabas -.- oh yup.. there was a board outside th office. i was searching for my name to know where's my eng class located at. a couple was next to me, searching for their names too, i guess? and th lady randomly said out my name, without knowing that 'nurkaseh binte ismail' is actually th girl standing next to them. hahaha. she's so cute. i controlled my laughter and then, walked off.

there's only 11 people in my class. i hople there's more next week. and im looking forward for my chem/bio class at yew tee tomorrow evening (:

i got english homework, and er, it seems difficult? D;

i'm not in a good mood, idk why. c'mon kaseh, smile please?

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-22T05:12:00.001+08:00

well, as said on my previous post. i'l be blogging for th lastime for now. but i donthink it's th last one for today. maybe more at night (:

soo.. i was browsing through th net and i found nice quotes and i decided to share th quotes w you lovely readers, ehe.

Have you ever wondered which hurts th most? saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had?

My body isn't perfect, i don't walk w confidence, i get into fights w my parents and friends. Some nights i'd rather be by myself than out partying. I cry over th smallest things sometimes. There are days that i get through w forced smiles and fake laughs. Sometimes i try to convince myself that things are okay when they're not. I'm not ugly but i'm not beautiful. I don't look as good in real life as i do in pictures. There are some nights that i cry myself to sleep. I constantly think i'm not good enough. I'm imperfect, but i'm perfectly me.

Just because she comes off strong, doesn't mean she didn't fall asleep crying. And eventhough she acts like nothing's wrong, maybe she's just really good at lying.

Sometimes, you just can't tell anybody how you really feel not because you dont know why, not because you dont know your purpose, not because you dont trust them, but because you cant find th right words to make them understand.

When one door closes, another opens; but we look too long upon th closed door that we do not see those that have opened for us.

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; a nuffnanger, i am (:

2010-02-22T04:04:00.092+08:00

so yup, i'm blogging again. once i got th mood to blog, i can't stop typing. even if i'm out of topic.. i will still think of one even if it's a not-needed-topic to be blogged about. then i'l have to elaborate to make th post very long. then it's up to you readers to read or not (: cause when i look at my blog.. even me.. i dont feel like reading cause th posts were too long -.-

it's 4:09 am, in 4hours, this is th 3rd post i'm posting. th second one was long. so yup.. i dont know what to blog about.. then i came up w an idea.. and it's about nuffnang! i never really talked much about nuffnang, i only talked about me cashing out th money and received moola. yup, that's all. firstime i cashed out was last year; november and i waited for two months to receive th cheque. then th second time i cashed out was on th dec, and got th cheque on th febuary. so yup, makan berbulan nak tunggu cheque tiba -.-

now, it's enough to cash out again, for th third time but i just dont want.. i dont know why laa. mcm makin sikit, makin sikit gitu. so yup, there's no hurry to cash out now. anyway, th updation of th earnings macam lambat eh? ahaaa.

i decided to print screened my nuffnang account's analytics; 'came from'.. do take a look (:

Last month;

Last week;

This week;

Today;

no, it's not really about th number of times that my blog being visited but im just wondering.. who are th people from other countries who read my blog? mcm rasa bersalah gitu, dorang faham ke bila kaseh berbual melayu? ahaha.

Key word;

i've been a nuffnanger for months and up till now, i dont know th meaning of 'keyword' in nuffnang. can dear someone explain it to me? (:

oh yup, i would like to thank you readers (be it th one who likes or hates me) for reading my blog ^.^

thankyou(english), gamsahamnida(korean), xie xie(chinese;mandarin), terimakasih(malay), obgigada(portugese), arigatou gozaimasu(japanese), salamat po(filipino;tagalog), muchas gracias(spanish), grazie(italian), danke(german), bedankt(dutch), merci(french), toda raba(hebrew), doje(chinese;cantonese), dhenabad(bengali), dhanyavaad(hindi), mahalo(hawaiian)

woo, sanggup gi check kat internet :D

oh yup, th previous post.. i was talking about th tube-shaped pink perfume.. it dropped on th floor. for a second, i thought it gonna be broken in pieces.. but fuhh, it didn't. kalau tak, kaseh menangis tak berlagu oi, teeeet.

oh yup.. i went to th kitchen an hour ago. i was so thisty and went to drink a glass of coke. i saw a cockroach. (psst, im not like most girls who'll scream their lungs out when there's cockroach) th cockroach was lying upside down, looks like it was in great pain, like cannot move like that. very pitiful. but at th same time, it disgusted me much laaaaa. there was a gala near me, i picked up th gala and no.. i didnt kill it. i turned it upside down and left it alone. its like.. very pitiful laa. macam seriously, kesian gitu. boleh nangis nengok. idk where it is now, masih hidup ke tak, wahuallam. hopefully it wont come into my room orrrrrrr i'l kill it. hehe, no la.. fake aja. i won't kill, i'll pick it up and throw it outside th window. i cannot see it die infront of my eyes. not scary, just very pitiful. i dont know laa, am i weird? or strange, or.. something's wrong in my head? ahahah, bleah. see la, one big paragraph about cockroach, kaan pathetic tuuh -.-

nak tidur, tapi macam tanaak. another post? one last one for now? i'l see first (:

oh yup, i think there's a tembel growing at my right eye. why must it grow today, first day of class?! daa tak handsome ah gini! D;

assalammua'laikum warahmatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-22T02:32:00.008+08:00

aww, i am so touched when i went to sisAeynn's blog and read her recent post. so yup, i decided to print screened this from her blog, heee he. i love you too, kakak sayang (Y)

yesterday night w sisAeynn on bed was way better than tonight. i sounded wrong? no. hahaha. yes, i sleep w sisAeynn on each and every night and i like i love. i hate tonight cause she's not in a good mood and she's on th phone now! what else kan, tak habishabis fight w her 'classmate', bleah. i dont like whenever sis has her special one, cause i will always feel neglected. yes, truth is.. i'm greedy when it comes to loves from sister! hmph.

th chalet i went last few weeks ago w family.. one of my aunt said something when she saw sis and i were hugging tightly and kissed.

aunt: ish, ni dua beradik susah nk nampak dorang separate, asyik bersama aja.
sis and i: *smile*
mum: ye asyik bersama tapi bila gaduh.. ya allah. satu rumah bising, *rolled eyes*

hahahahahaha, but what mum said was true la. but whatever it is.. air dicincang tak akan putus laa eh? wait, betul tak peribahasa kaseh gunakan? aha! speaking of peribahasa, th most subject im afraid of is malay cause im aiming too high for th subject. they say, malay o's and n's are different. i cant possibly get grade 1 for o's like i got for my n's last year ); but n's oral's result was very disappointing, i got merit. nevermind laa, at least i'm aware that i write better than i talk, that's enough (: cause before this, many thought that i can score for malay only w th help from oral. so bad, must look down on me till like that one, eh? hmph. even teacher looks down on me, before n's, she targeted that i'm gonna get grade 3 -.- nevermind, semuanya telah berakhir laa kan.

oh back to my sisAeynn.. i mentioned that yesterday night w her was great cause we laughed alot. i tickled her, she tickled me. i molested her but she didnt get th chance to molest me back cause i dont know why, i was so rough. hahaha. and she got bullied by me, like seriously. and i wanted her to repeat what i said and guess what th sentence i wanted her to repeat after me? "aku kakak seh, asal adik aku bully aku gini macam?" hahhahaaha. she got totally fed up and irritated, but i dont care much and continue disturbing her. i could see that she got totally annoyed by me and she cried. hahaha. wait, i thought i really made her cried (macam achievement ah gitu buat kakak nangis) but she actually pretended. eventhough i thought it was an achievement (achievement la sangat eh) still, she made me in great suspense. dingdongbell betul -.- cause as a younger sister, i'l feel guitly if i were to make my older sister cry. but she, as an older sister, didnt feel a thing if she makes me cry. i cry alot even about th smallest thing so i guess, she's immune to it and will go, "alahai, budak ni asyik nangis. biarlah." mesti gitu kan, kak? dengdeng taraaak guna betul -.-

oh by th way, it's 1:47am right now, house phone is currently ringing. who on earth is calling at this time? -.- i couldn't be bothered to go out of my room to pick up th calls, what more to find out who picked up th call. and ask th one who picked up th call who's calling.

oh maan, th phone is now ringing for th second time. i ditch my laziness and went out of th room. mum answered th phone and she didnt talk. i was so curious and picked up th other phone which is at th living room and listened, someone sent message to my house number. i didnt have th chance to take down th number cause there's no pen and paper near me and my phone wasn't w me. so.... yup. bleah, i find that phone rings are so irritating, eh? i got irritated too whenever my phone rings and maybe that's th reason why it is very rare to see me off my silent mode. i always got scolding from dad for putting my phone on silent mode cause his phone calls are always ignored by me >.< and my friends will always say, "kaseh, hp tu pergi buang sudaaaaah" cause i seldom pick up their calls and always reply text messages late. sorry laa, i can't help it. phone vibrate kdgkdg tak rasa laa kan. waaait till i get a new phone and i'l start anew w it. start anew ke hape? hehe. when i got new phone, baru ada mood nak change everything; find good song for my ring tones/message tones. ahaha, i is so kental -.-

you know what.. few minutes ago, there were random things on my mind. th word 'appetite' came into my mind. random kan, i tawuuu. i was thinking real hard to translate it to malay. idk why i can't think properly now. so i think punya think, i still couldn't find th word. i even thought of waking sister up just to ask what's 'appetite' in malay but after thinking much, i comfirm chop double chop that she wont wake up. she comfirm malas nak layan me. so i went to take my school bag since there's kamus mini insde. sanggup eh? semangat gitu. when i took out th kamus which has traslation from malay to english and english to malay.. before i open th book.. th word came into my mind already, dingdong betul kan -.- menyusah kan orang! appetite tu SELERA. i know laaa, this paragraph is so not needed, very pathetic but.. nevermind lor. i like long post v^.^v

oh yup.. since i was talking about kamus. mhmm.. first day of class.. i seriously dont know what to bring. so i stuffed in nonsense things inside so it will look like a school bag -.- not much things inside since i dont need to buy any book so guess what's inside? my kamus mini. foolscape paper. pencil box. file w blank white papers inside. calculator. deodorant. dove thraphy hair cream. enchanteur powder. compact powder. lip balm. story book and an umbrella. oh yup clips too and errr, 11 mini lollipops o.O nevermind laa, buat perhiasan dalam bag -.- so yup, foolscape, fail, pencil box, kamus mini, deodorant, lip balm are pink in colour. wooo, pinkkk. i want a new umbrella (cause my current umbrella is blue) so i told mum to get me a pink one and mum said, "kau takmu merepek la kaseh, semua benda nk pink. semua benda nk pink. merepek la kau. ni mesti nk payung ada heartshapes kan?" HAHAHA, woah mum knows every little thing about me eh? idk ah, i think im really am irritating. kaseeeh, semua benda tkya nk pink purrrrrr. abih sikitsikit nak heartshapes, fikir cute purrrrrr? sheesh. oh yup, there's a perfume inside my bag too. its like a tube-shaped, pink colour. and it's from someone.. someone i'm missing right now. he's gone just like that but as mentioned on my previous post, i'm thankful that he has made me smile and happy during our 10days of (somehow) close friendship. i just miss his voice and i like th way we communicate, 'saya, awak' language. cute kaaaaaan? tawu, ehe ): i miss th webcamming sessions too.

kaseh, please smile.. cause you deserve to be happy. ok da, da happy balik da. jom.. continue cerita (:

and why nowdays i tend to blog a long post? i wonder if any of you read or not. but nevermind, i love blogging :D and.. i dont know why i talk about so-th-tk-perlu things. but okay la tu eh, at least ada topic nk talktalk, shareshare. ehehhe ;P

cerita da habis, next post soon, in a couple of hours time v^.^v

anyway kaan, i plucked out my pimple already. wait, 'plucked out'.. is it a right word to use? ah nevermind, you readers understand kan? so okay la tu ;P so yup, jerawat dah masak, orang kopek laa. abih kan kan kan, tak handsome seh jerawatnya tanda kat dagu niii, sheesh ); ada cream untuk hilangkan jerawatnya tanda tak?!

assalammua'laikum waramatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-21T00:23:00.011+08:00

woke up from having just 4hours of sleep. had to take my shower and then, attend a wedding. i dont know who got married justnow, but.. congrats. mum told me to wear punjabi suit, i have to choice and had to obey her. went w th family, and at th beginning.. everyone wasn't in th mood and i dont know why. mhm, oh.. th pimples on my face (chin and forehead), those are such an irritant. i dont use any facial wash, so someone.. recommend me a good one? guess what? i got scoldings from my mum! cause... i got pimples on my face -.- very weird la mum, scold me cause i got pimples on my face. da jerawat nak keluar... apa boleh buat. ayaaaaayai. another weird reason for getting scolded from mum is.. i usually dont reply text messages from guys and mum say, "kau fikir kau siapa? asal nak sombong sampai tk angkat call, tk reply msg? ngada ngada." terus mulut kaseh ternganga. hahaha, daa kenapa laaa kaaaaan. apa sahajaaa -.-

oh, prepaid still lowwwwwwwww.

oh and its been quite some times that i wear make up without using foundation. all finish already, compact powder, eye liner, mascara all gonna finish in any time. someone.. recommend me a good foundation?

oh i realised that when a girl hates a girl.. they will tend to find th girl's blemishes and mostly would insult th girl by saying, 'she's pretty only w makeups on'. or perhaps, 'she's only pretty in pictures'. and most of th time, only haters would take th trouble to zoom at our features to see our flaws.

told my dad all these, and he said, he prefers me w without makeups on. obviously, he just wanted to soothe my heart, kan! hahaha. and i then told dad w th cheeky expression on my face, 'ada lagi lelakilelaki yang prefer kaseh without make up tau! lagi dorang kata mcm actress indon!' and as usual, whenever i told dad about th compliments i received, he would roll his eyes. hahahaha, bleaaah. whatever it is, i admit that i look like a plain jane without make ups, so yep.. i bet.. you readers will definitely go, 'ah, sedar pun ni kaseh' -.- thanks ^.^

class starts tomorrow, not looking forward. thank god, mum wanted to accompany me to ite simei. hopefully mum will gimme kachingz on tuesday morning, cause i wanna shop w friends.

oh one more thing, mum told me she wanted to send me to class everyday, and i was likeee, 'please mum, dont!'. ayayaaaaaai, then how to meet friends and all?! sheesh.

i can't sleep, i want to blog again in few minutes time. wait for th coming horrrrrr.

oh ya, happy birthday granddaddy. i remember your birthday. sis and mum remember too. but i dont know why i dont have th guts to wish you. i feel so baaad. i'l get for you something tomorrow, mhmm, your favourite chocolate? ^.^ *hugs and kisses*

assalammua'laikum warahmatullah hiwabarakatuh.

; aliveness (woah, more than 20 paragraphs o.O)

2010-02-20T05:54:00.012+08:00

Hi! Hello! Hullo! Aloha! Greetings! Hiya! Howdy! Yo! *waves and smile widely*

th way i greet.. it's so obvious that i'm in a good mood right now. eheheehe. so yup, i think, i wanna blog a very long post. read it like you're reading a novel, oteyoyo? if it's too long and you don't feel like reading, then it's okay cause i blog just for th sake of blogging and since i have no one to talk to right now (duh, it 2:28am and everyone is busy sleeping) i shall just type out everything's in my mind, seems like i'm entertaining myself, so yup, suka hati kau laaa eh kaseh, type laa berapa panjang kau nak, asal kan kau bahagia k kaseh k ^.^v

okay, nak mulakan dengan apa? mulakan dengan Bismillah, disudahi dengan Alhamdulillah,
begitu lah seharian dalam hidup kita, mogamoga dirahmati oleh Allah.. *continue singing* ehehhee.

kay la kay la, let's get serious.. *muka serious* -.- alamaaak, seriously, boredom is so killing me right now. bosaaaaaaaan! bososeh giloleh tawoweh? faham tak apa kaseh berbual? ehehehe, kalau faham.. 5 markah untuk anda! *clapclap* yaaaaaaaay.

okay, sumpah kaseh layan diri sendiri -_________- bleah, jom dengar cerita kaseh......

yesterday, th friday 19th! plan of going out w th lovely girlfriends was canceled. yayah dear, i'm sorry for not attending your chalet. but please make yourself free next week on friday th 26th, okay? same goes to jana, lina, ifa, sepet, tikah and muny, girls.. make yourself free please? complete girlfriends outing! :B lina and ifa, text me soon! we must meet before th 26th! ^.^v

today th saturday 20th, dad's pay! kaseh kaseh, part gaji aja mesti ingaaaaaaat eh! huaaaaaaak, ehe. but i think th plan of going to jb is postponed to next week. this is so saddening, please. i want to shopppppppp so much, before class starts, bleah. mum always give me false hopes D: but mum saaaaid, she'll comfirm w me again later in th morning, so i guess there's still 1% of hope -.-

i'm going out w my dearest primary school friends on this coming sundaaaaay! shopppping! excitedddddd tawuk, tau tau, ehe! ^.^v

mondaaay... bleah. yes, i'm excited cause i'm starting my first day of night class on th 22nd feb at ite simei, but i hate th fact that i'm going to register again. which means, i have to come early....... alone! tak ke memalukan gituuu? register sorangsorang, tengahari pula tuu, pasti banyak budakbudak ite, maluuuuuuuuuu ); yeeeee, memang laa kaseh ni suka cuci mati (haha, admit seh kaseh) tetapi... macam awkward gitu kan? hahaha, tak apa kaseh, kaseh kan independant, kaseh boleh register sorangsorang, jangan takut kay? (boleh gitu eh, sedap kan hati sendiri -.-)

i'm still not sure about my classes schedule! i dont know if my classes is on th mon-fri or mon-thurs and sat, ayayaaaaai. so troublesome. if my dad and sis didn't force me to take partime classes, things wouldn't be like this and i should have already enjoying my time schooling at ite; new friends, seeing my cyberfriends in th school, get allowance everyday, got a reason to ask money for topping up ezlink card and etcetera. mum gave me allowance only two times a month and th next day i will go shopping, then boom, finish.. cashless. i'm using adult ezlink card, two to three trips a day and boom, habis duit ezlink. lecoceh kan kan kan? if you're an adult and you take public transport, please agree! *click like* bleah, maybe there's a reason... oh well ); i'm not spoiled, never a spoiled child but whenever i ask my parents for th things i want and when i got it.. i feel that i'm spoiled. apa aja eh kaseh, nak benda abih da dapat, terus feel bad sendiri -.- you understand what i'm trying to say? hahaha, nevermind. i'm confuse too -.-

and th day goes on, but i always believe that tommorrow will always be a better day, so don't stop smiling (:

i'm going to be seventeen in months time, i think i am still toooo young to get involved in relationship. when i reminisce th past, th times when i thought that love is wonderful, and th one i'm in love(d) w was my everything, i sulked if he didn't entertain th way i want to be entertained, i love acting like a child cause i love being pampered, i talked like toddler does, i purposely texted like i'm not in th mood just to get attention from him, i want him to be w me always, i want him to always spend his time on me.. only me, i get angry and jealous when other girls trying to flirt w him, i hate when he took pictures w other girls, and etcetera. no, im not referring to only one of my past, i'm actually referring to each and every of my pasts.. yup, all th pasts that had created bittersweet memories w me. even if i hate any of my pasts, i can't change th fact that they have actually made me smiled and made me felt wonderful. well, hating is very tiring actually. so i am thankful to all th people who had made me felt marvellous, who had made my day-ed sucha splendid ones. well, there's some of th pasts whom have gave me happiness only for a short period of time. meaning, they are th ones who come and go as they wish, giving me false hopes but still... i cherish th times they made me felt happy and gave me th reason to smile :B i know there must be a reason why i had to be hurt by th ones whom i chose to commit w, but in th end, i realised that th hopes they gave were actually false. yes, it hurts real much and then, i realised something.. this is th feeling how th guys whom i gave false hopes have felt. yes, karma. i believe in karma, so i accept every karmas that had happened to me.

everytime i got hurt and had to end every relationship between me and th other party.. there's one paragraph has always made me feel thankful and strong...

"Jika seseorang itu hadir dalam hidup saya dan menjadi sebahagian daripada saya tapi ada sebab-sebab tertentu dia terpaksa pergi, saya tak akan terlalu sedih dan akan terima kenyataan itu. sekurang-kurangnya, dia pernah membahagiakan saya, jadi saya redha." - Syu, syurga cinta. (:

th pasts.. i'm not referring only to my two ex-boyfriends, but also to my ex-dates and guyfriends (: and those who hated me for giving you false hopes, like i've always said, i never had th intention to do so, love cannot be forced, i've always wanted to increase my circle of friends, yup i just wanna befriend, not more and not less. i never regretted knowing each and every of th people in my past, so i hope.. i have made my part of being your friends (:

oh, to all my friends.. girlfriends... cyberfriends... guyfriends.. acquaintances.. cousins.. family members.. and whoever who knows me or currently still contacting me.. or still talking to me.. mhmm, i'm aware that i'm not a good friend to my friends, not a good daughter to my parents, not a good sister to my sister, not a good cousin to my cousins, never a good girlfriend to my exboyfriends, not a good partner to my exdates cause i never had th time to actually talk to some of you, reply to each and every of your text messages, answer phone calls, reply facebook messages, chatango offline messages, msn offline messages, at times, i tend to cancel meet up plans at th very last minute, i always seem busy, i seldom be th one who is always there when you need someone to share problems w, to have a shoulder to cry on, or someone to make you smile.. i feel bad, very bad.

i always whine that i'm bored, i always have unsettled problems, feel lonely, neglected, and etcetera, but th fact is.. most of you are always there and never failed to give me advices on chatango offline messages, facebook messages, msn offline messages, text messages and more. i feel bad, i'm sorry for being a bad friend, i really wanna apologise if some of you feel unappreciated );

i always share my problems w dad and he told me that i have alot of 'musuh dalam selimut' and i must be careful. yup, i agree w that. being hated is quite disturbing but hating is really tiring. well, if you hate me.. please confront me.. it would be better than talking behind my back, spreading rumours about me and etc. i find it really annoying and it anguishes me much. i dont understand why sometimes people easily believe what people said, and by listening to other's sayings, th one who listened will start to hate. no offence, tapi macam tak ada akal gitu kan? dengar dari mulut orang, tanpa selidik, terus nak membenci? i mean like.. do you know how to differentiate th right and th not right?

sometimes when my anger arouse, or my softness is not there anymore.. people around me will tend to say that i've changed and becoming worse. wait.. do you know that i have feelings too? i can't forever let poeple step on my head, i also know how to get angry, i also dont want people to take advantage of my kindness. yes, i admit.. i'm not th old kaseh anymore, i'm quite loud now. but that doesn't mean that i've changed from good to evil, right? i can't forever say 'yes', and i'm happy that i have learnt to say 'no'. i dont want to forever be like kerbau kena cucuk hidung. ah kan, da mula peribahasa, ^.^

oh ya, i'm not sticky. what i meant is actually.. i dont stick to only one when it comes to friendssssss. get this clear, i am very sociable, i dont favouritism, and i treat my circle of friends equally. so please, no one have th right to control me from befriending w anyone i want. i have a life, please.

regarding boyfriend.. or shoud i say, having a partner to be in relationship w.. like i mentioned justnow.. i sulked, wanted attentions, jealousy always happened and more when in relationship.. it is very immature so yup.. i've realised th mistakes i've made. so everytime girls accused me for flirting w their boyfriends.. i totally understand th feelings and i solve th problems in a good way. no like some other girls.. when kena confront aja, they purposely make th girlfriend lagi jealous. nak buat kebencian orang buat apa kan? isn't it better to get th problems settled and so, no hatreds will be encountered? yes, i hate having foes.

i also did mentioned that hating is tiring. like for example, some immatures framed me by creating me msn, tagged, bearshare, friendster accounts.. then they had to copy pictures from my blog and facebook and paste on th fake accounts. they had to pretend being me, some would even buy new number to text and talk on th phone w th victims. just because that you immatures hate me, you have to take th trouble doing all these nonsensical things? im not being rude here, but seriously, where have your brains gone to? what's th reasons behind all these? jealousy? what is there to be jealous of? my life is never perfect, and th life that i'm living in has always treated me unfairly, and you want this life? or maybe, th satisfaction you got when you suceed in framing me and make my name goes bad? is it a nice thing to do? seriously, i dont hate you doing all these. yes, part of me.. i'm really sad and angry but another part.. i pity you immatures. no, i'm not being sarcastic but seriously, i pity you immatures for getting th sins. even if you still hate me and still creating fake accounts of me, i'd still forgive you sincerely and even if i got to know who are those immatures.. i wont revenge.. cause i know that god is fair.. you'll get karma sooner or later. may god bring you to th right path, insyaallah (:

sometimes when i recall th past.. and realised how much mistakes i've done. i know it is never too late for me to repent, but i never really have th time to do what a muslim have to do. you get me? honestly, i seldom see myself doing th prayers and it is sucha disgrace.. like seriously. i feel ashamed to blog about this but.. yes.. i'm just letting out my bottled up feelings. i've always wishing that one day, i could read th quran fluently. that's what i have always dreamt of. i finally have a dream, like woaaaaah. ahahah, cause everytime when people ask me, what is my dream, i will always reply either 'idk' or 'never thought of it yet'. ahahahah, tsk!

i promised to dad, and had to swear in th name of Allah that after i've done my studies.. i have to take classes for akhirat purpose. but im afraid cause dad want to send sister and me to Pesantren, at Indonesia. i can't imagine living there, wearing jilbab all th time. yuuup, i'm imagining... cause i watched 'Syahadat cinta' just now in th afternoon and yes... soo, that is how Pesantren looks like, eh? woo. th rules are so strict o.O i think i'l find my jodoh there. hahahaha. mana tahu kahwin ngan ustaz kat sana ke? >.<

you know.. when i start blogging this post.. i thought i'm gonna talk all th nonsensical things.. look at my first paragraph, how annoying and childish -.- but then, i realised that i feel much better after blogging all my bottle up feelings.

i think, i need to head to bed already. it's already 5:20am. time flies real fast, and i dont want to wake uppppppp late like just now! i woke up at 4pm and i was late... th banks were all closed, cannot withdraw moneeeey ); so i hope i'l get to withdraw my nuffnang money today ^.^v

ohh maaan, mum woke up already and went inside my room! i just got scolded for not sleeping and she said she wont wake me up so i cant withdraw my money. mummy, why mummy so bad today? mummy kan seldom scold me! i'm sulking now ); ahahaha, hentikan eh kaseh, irritating tau! >.< okay that's all for today! much loves, xx.

~

okay, i'm back. i didnt sleep justnow and now, it's already 6:48am. i went to have my breakfast, like woo.. i am so full right now. i think i'll sleep only after i'm back from dbs/posb bank ): bleah, cause mum told me that today.. th bank closes early. yup, half day since it's weekend ); so troublesomeeeeeeee, hmph.

assalamualaikum warahmatullah hiwabarakatuh.

2010-02-18T19:35:00.001+08:00

Greetings to all inhabitant of the earth! :B

look at th picture, i have no idea why i still have that green thingy. well, it's not mine but it has been w me since 25th nov 09, and if i were to misplace it somewhere, i will somehow feel not completed. yes, weird. th green thingy may be nothing but.. ah nevermind, drop th topic. boo );

so yup, i remember i did mentioned on th previous post that my blog cannot upload any more pictures right? yes, th number of pictures has exceeded. if you're wondering how i manage to upload th pictures here.. well, i have to log in into sisAeynn's blogger, upload th pictures there and copy th edit html and paste it to my edit html. very troublesome rightttttttt, ); what to do, that's th only way and i hate uploading pictures through photobucket, grrrrr.

what else to update? oh yuuuuuup, i received a text message from ite. they withdrew me from th partime night classes! very rude kaan! but serve me right laa, my fault for not answering their calls. ite texted and told me that they called me for numerous time but i didnt answer and so, they had no choice and had to withdrew me. ayayaaai! how i knowwww, i got th habit of not answering phone calls what ); so i immediately called ite and explained everything. bleah, need to register again -.- seee laa, i have to go ite simei early on th monday! kena register sorangsorang pulaa tu! hopefully mum will accompany me, *pray hard*

cepat eh masa berlalu? monday dah mula class, hmmm. pejam celik pejam celik, nanti dah exams. fail ke pass, kaseh pun tatawu. so kaseh, belajar eh please! ayayai, seraaaaaaam, please );

mhmm, i got to go already. i wanna continue watching 'devil beside you'. ep 15 already, wooooooo. takecare readers!

prepaid low, can't reply text messages, sorry!

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-18T18:59:00.007+08:00

Hiiiii lovely readers! ;D

was out w my dearest primary school friends yesterday. i thought i was late, but no. ehehehe. we didnt had our dinner at simpang bedok or pastamania but at swensens, parkway (: we had a hard time deciding where to eat. th options were siam kitchen, kartini indon, fish and co... ayayaaaai. nextime kitaaa makan kat fish and co. atau secret recipe, jooom? yippie! ^^

went cotton on and oh my, is cotton having sale now? weeee. yaaaay, shopping w them on th saturday! er, no! mai, qu, sha, min.. if you were to read this, pleaseeeee change our shopping date to Sunday? i cannot make it on saturdaaay, got a last minute plan to jb w family -.-

dont go shooping without me! D: see you girls soonest okay! ^^

oh, i had a nice time reminiscing those primary school days w dearest them, hehe! thanks for th day, lovelies! (Y)

more pictures on facebook!

assalammua'laikum.

; Hairstyles that make me melt (Y)

2010-02-18T04:52:00.008+08:00

Yo readers, meet Muhammad Shafiran. since i dont know what to blog about now, i shall talk about this boy who has hotttt hairstyle, okay? ^^

fie oh fie, nak kaseh promote fie kaaaaan? ^.^ okay, well, this cute boy is currently single and available. his facebook name is 'muhammad syafiran' and his msn is smartrockstar@hotmail.com. if you're interested, feel free to add him up on msn and facebook cause he's one friendly boy. ok, yippie yay! ^^

ohhh, look at his hair, his hair, his hair. i go gugugaga over guys w this kind of hairstyles.

sooo readers (male only eh, cause im straight), if your hairstyle is like this, please give me a message on facebook ^^ actually.. you dont need to exactly have th same hairstyle laa, just w long sideburns and nice fringe, i can melt already. hahhahahhahhhahhaha, just kidding laaaaa. im not interested in guys anymore! o.O (i sounded like i'm not straight. oh, maybe?) ok bye! :/

FIE, PLEASE THANK ME IF ALOT OF GIRLS ADD YOU UP ON FACEBOOK AND MSN, OKAY? WOO, I AM SO NICE, WINKWINK v^.^v jommm, belanja kaseh icecream, eheheheheheeh.

oh lemme tell you a lil about him, okay? mhm, he's gonna be 19 on th 13th sept, you can either call him shaf or fie. Schooling at Nyp and his exams are around th corner, i hope he has already prepared for th exams. hahahaha, i am so caring, woo. caring laa sangat eh kaseh ;B

so yup, th pictures below are our webcam pictures. there's moreeeeeeeee, but i shall just upload a few only laaa, hokay? few laaa sangat, padahal banyak juga laaa, eh? -.- bahaha.

oh yup, i got another webcam picture but this was print screened like few months back; last year. since i am talking about hairstyle.. so yup, th intention of uploading th picture below is just to show another guy w make-me-melt hairstyle.. that's all. boooooo! ):

okaaaay, th guy next to me is khairunizam! ^^ this picture is also taken like few months back, around july 09.. i think? yup. i like his hairstyle too. ijam! see, your ex still remembers you. that day at fb.. anyhow only said i've forgotten about you! bleah. meet me soon, ok ijam?! huhuhaha.

okay, th name of this guy is Wu chun. i like his hairstyle too eventho it's not that thick like th ones like fie, ijam and er.. mysterious boy.

okay, now it's Mike he! i'm currently gugugaga-ing over him cause i'm watching 'Devil Beside You'; yup, Taiwan drama series on You Tube! go watch, Rainie is so cute ^^v and oh, go watch 'Why Why Love' also, i finished watching it already. it took me like a week to finish watching it tau! th main actor and actress are also Rainie and Mike he ;D ooooh, and when im watching th drama series, i think Ijam looks like Mike he! wooo. Why Taiwan/Korean people, th hair so nice one ah, ah, ah? o.O

oh and this one, my ex-boyfriend. heheheheheheheh, Jung ji hoon or also known as Rain! i went gugugaga over him when i watched th korean drama; Full house! masa last year, semangat i nonton kat kbs channel every Saturday, sanggup bangun pagi sebab nak nonton cerita ni; 9am till 2pm oiiiii ^^ rain baby, you got nice body and hairstyle. you so cuteeeeee :P and readers! do you know that megan fox wanna date rain and rain rejected her? really! i read about Rain at Yahoo. woah, my rain so faithful to me eh, eh, eh? i like ^^ oh and i think, Ijam looks like Rain too! :B

NOW GET READY TO MELT AND DROOLS! IT'S ALEX EVANS! SEE TH HAIR, HAIR, HAIR, HAIR, HIS SMILE, SMILE, SMILE, HIS EYES, EYES, EYES, HIS...... EVERYTHING. *STARE AT HIS PICTURES AND DROOLS*

Comfirm chopchop double chop, i will be dreaming about Alex Evans tonight, *cheekysmile+winkwink*

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-17T18:02:00.001+08:00

hello lovely readers! i wish i could blog a very long post but i can't. i need to go off in five minutes time, meeting my dearest primary school friends in like ten minutes time at bedok interchange.

seeeee la, life is not treating me good... like again! having so many problems and all i can do is to ignore. it would be better if i solve those problems right? but i just dont know how. so annoying.

class starts next week, i hope when i got myself busy with studies, th problems will be vanished from my mind. hopefully la eh, eh, eh? *pray hard*

see laaa, i cannot stop blogging. macam nk type type type, tknk stop stop stop. banyak lagi ni nk berbual, cuma masa aja tak mengizinkan. kalau kaseh ada super powers kan, macam nk hentikan masa tau. lagi best kalau boleh turn back th time, eh eh eh? agree please? *click like*

okay la, bye. i wanna meet my friends, excited nk jumpa mereka. nk go makaaaan. where? i dont know! either at simpang bedok or pastamania. yippie. perut dah mula nk krak kruk krak kruk -.- hungreeeh.

assalammua'laikum.

; hopes?

2010-02-17T01:20:00.002+08:00

Th feelings were just an infatuation. perhaps, a mere crushing. i over heard a shouting whisper, i shall now back off from someone who couldn't get rid of someone else's shadow. back to basic, people come and go.

well, too many things are currently hurting and confusing me. karma is happening to me.. again.

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-16T23:13:00.002+08:00

Hello Febuary Babies, sorry for th late wishing on blog :D so here it goes...

14th Feb;
Happy 17th Birthday, My dearest girlfriend; Siti Atikah Nurulhuda! th lastime we met was like months ago and you know, th girls and myself are missing you real much. i'm really excited that we gonna meet on this 19th, can't wait to hug you tightight tau! hope you had a great day on your birthday and smile always! love you *hugs*

15th Feb;
Happy 15th Birthday, Dian sayang! I'm sorry that i couldn't spentime w you on your birthday, i can't reply your text messages cause my prepaid is currently low. whatever it is, i hope you enjoyed your day and let's have an outing or at least a meet up real soon cause you know, i miss you real much. be happy always, love you *hugs*

16th Feb;
Happy 19th Birthday, Aliff Aziz. May happiness be w you. All th best in your career life and may your wishes come true. Never forget to always put a smile on your face, so th cute dimples will be visible, okay? hehe. Have an awesome day! i am still your fan, and also, your miss nightcrawler, winkwink. hehehe. Much misses.

16th Feb;
Happy 16th Birthday, My dearest cousin; Freda. May th joyousness be w you. Meet real soon please, i miss you very very much tau. it has been so long since you last had a sleepover at my place. Smile always and have a great day, love you! *hugs and kisses*

16th Feb;
Happy 17th Birthday, Lovely Emiliya. I miss you so much and it has been so long since we last met. i hope i'm still remembered by you. May your life full of happiness. Love you, have a nice day and smile always *hugs*

assalammua'laikum.

; Boys are nothing compared to my girlfriends (Y)

2010-02-16T21:36:00.002+08:00

hello lovely readers!

i dont celebrate valentines day but i went out on that very day. girlfriends and danzel iman were my valentines! hee hee. so yup, met up at lina's block and we then walked to bedok reservoir's voideck. chilled there, played taiti and bluff :D

after which, had an impromptu plan w anjang and eq. fishing at changi village. korang dapat starfish eh?! HAHA. so yup, bused home w ifa and muny. that's it. meeting th lovely girlfs on this coming 19th, yaaaaaaay!

geraaaaaamnya, cutekan iman! :P

there's more pictures on facebook. i dont know why i can't upload pictures on blog anymore, sheesh. it says that th amount of pictures on this site has exceeded(?!!!!!!!!!?!) gah.

assalammua'laikum.

; cutEsmeth ^.^

2010-02-14T05:25:00.008+08:00

Hi, good morning lovely readers. it's 5:17am right now. i can't sleep and am so hungry but i'm not gonna eat cause i'm on diet! pfft.

well, happy chinese new year to th chineses and happy valentines day to those who celebrates, have an awesome day! and oh, happy 17th birthday to my lovely girlfriend, siti atikah nurulhuda. only god knows how much i've been missing her );

anyway, i was out w fhamy esmeth last friday! hehehe. inital plan was to meet up at 3:30pm but i woke up late and so, we planned to meet at 4:30pm but end up, we met at 5pm, instead. hee he. trained to habourfront, wanted to watch movie but th tickets for most of th movies were selling fast and not available ); we then trained to orchard and had lunched at Far east; Puncak. awaak, thanks for th treat tau (Y) we then went to see th movies at cineleisure but sadly, most were selling fast and not available too );

so yup, had no where to go and yay, soon after, my dearest kika mustika reached, hehehe. wheee. we then went to a shop named.. er, i dont know, can't remember. isit sophera or something like that? haha. fhamy bought perfumes for kika, himself and me. thanks awak! (Y)

after which, we found a place to sit and snapped pictures, whee heee. oh yup, kika's cousin was there as well. er, but i can't remember his name. ayayai, i tend to forget things very easily you know. mhmmmm.

okay, i yawned for countless times. kika, irritating kan kaseh asyik sangap aja? padahal tak laah nantuk sangat tau. hehehee, habit ni habit. ayayai.

9plus, trained to bedok. kika met her friend, and fhamy bused to jurong. ohhh and now, i misssss fhamy and kika already ); thanks for th day, loves (Y)

after which, met sisAeynn at bedok inter, we then went to macd since sisAeynn wanted to study there, accompanied her till 2 in th morning. wooo, i was very sleepy, i tell you. initally, th plan was canceled but.. sisAeynn changed her mind since i offered to treat her. so guess what i bought? first, one large twister fries, one large normal fries and one large milo. when everything has finished, i went to buy another twister fries and one large milo. when everything has finished again, i went to buy another large normal fries and large jasmine green tea. ahh, comfirm chopchop pekerja kat mcd tu cakap, "tak habishabis budak ni punya muka" -.- eheheehhe, bleah.

apa lagi eh nak cakap? tu aja kan? hahaha. ok da. oh yuuuuuup, i'm meeting my lovely girlfriends later in th afternoon, will be having picnic w dearest them, much misses! yeeeeeeeeha :P and eight days to go... night classes!

anyway, yesterday th saturday was quite a mundane day cause i stayed at home th whole day but oh, i watched 'Jab we met' at vasantham central. wooooo, very nice story and oh my, syahid kapur punyalah handsome. i almost melted tau! ehehehe. and at night, i watched 'from bandung with love' at Sensasi, i wish i have a boyfriend like Dion! hmm.

oh yaaaaaaa.....

"Nuffnang.. your moola has arriveddd!"

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-10T04:11:00.002+08:00

Alohaaa world :D

oh well, i stayed at home th whole of yesterday but i went out today, out from th house at around 8pm. sister almost canceled th plan and i was very pissed off, i tell you. i cried alot today, i dont like when one breaks th promises );

sister consoled me by wanting to meet me at tamp at 830pm. yesterday, she promised to meet at around 2pm at dhoby g! but nevermind, she had school work to do. i'm sorry kakak for having that kind of attitude at food culture. i was very pissed off till i cried. i'm sorry that i have to walked away from you. SisAeynn's friend; Hasif.. maaaf sangatsangat taaau tentang apa terjadi tadi, ayayai.

so, i roamed at century sq and tamp mall alone. yes, i had things to buy, so yup.. shopped alone. nevermind, i'm used to it. bleaaah );

after buying th things, i went to interchange to board th bus. coincidently, sisAeynn was waiting for th bus too -.- obviously, she was shocked cause i lied that i was already on th way home. yelaaa, tengah merajuk/marah mestilah tipu, daa tak kuasa lagi. hmph. she said, "i miss you". alala, cakap 'i miss you' aja, terus kaseh daa tak maraaah, terus kaseh punya kepala batu daa hilang! >.<

reached bedok, sister treated me mango ice longan, yummy :P then i dont know why, we went ntuc and spent like half an hour there. fyi, it was already 12 in th morning! hahaha, masih ramai orang tau kat ntuc. cny's coming, th people needs to shopppp.. no wonder la. ahaha.

after which, we went to playground and snapped manymany pictures. surprisingly, mum didnt call to scold us for coming home late. hahha, my parents were busy sleeping.. no wonder la! heh heh.

oh, it's so obvious that i've gained weight right? look at my cheeks! getting chubbier and i so dont like! haiyaaak. i cannot stop eating, especially when im not in th mood or when im stress. hahaha. and my thigh, like omg, fatty fatty bom bom D;

k, that's all. tadaaaaaaa. upcoming plans, i like i love; excited! (Y)

oh yes, i was really on th phone..... w someone! ^^v

sisAeynn: laa, step cute pula budak ni.

after snapping and looked at this picture..

sisAeynn: alala, cutenya!

kaseh: -_______-

kakaaak, i love youuu veh veh much! once again, i'm sorreh! xoxo.

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-08T22:05:00.002+08:00

it's 9:34pm right now. i just reached home from tamp w my lovely parents :D

everything i imagined really happened justnow, bahaha. so yup, had spaghetti at food culture. lunched there w parents and mum's bestf, cik sam :D cik sam cabbed home while mum, dad and i went to upgrade th scvc box thingy. yay, now can record already ^^

well, as predicted, mum don't want to buy me th billabong bag. but i still got it. hahaha, thanks to my darling dad who forced mum to buy. yay. due to that, mum's not talking to me now. hahahaha, eleeeeh.

mhmmmm, stationaries bought. i just need to change my calculator's batt. and then, i'm ready for class on 22nd feb!

oh yaaaaa, dad and i were supposed to meet mum at 3:30pm. guess what? i woke up at 3pm and then, had to wake dad up. oh my, its not easy to wake dad up, i tell you. he's just th same like sis and i! hahaha, when i wake him up, he kept on saying, "five more mins please?" hahhahaa. kedebak kedebuk, dad and i went out of th house at 3:50pm instead. so yup, i webcamwhored while waiting for dad to finish his shower and do his prayer. mandi berjamjam, ayaaaaayai.

well, went tamp justnow. so yup, walked w dad and as usual, i eyecandied. so, there's this one guy walked past us.

kaseh: ayah! nampak tadi laki tu? tingggggi. woo, handsome!
ayah: tak habishabis. dia nampak taak yang kaseh tengok dia?
kaseh: kaseh terlihat! nampak laa tu agaknya.
ayah: asal kasi nampak? nanti dia bangga ada gadis cantik tengok dia.
kaseh: *sengehsengeh* maknanya ayah cakap kaseh cantik eh eh eh?
ayah: *roll eyes*

hahahahaha, th highlight part was dad rolled his eyes! i caaaan still remember how he rolled his eyes, veh funny! ^^

oh ya, i thinkkkkkkkk, i change my mind of canceling th plan on friday. *excited* i'm meeeeeting someone! *winkwink*

i'm in a good mood now, yeeha!

assalammua'laikum.

; running away might be th best solution?

2010-02-08T12:49:00.004+08:00

Have you ever felt of wanting something/someone so much and when you finally got it, you realised that you actually dont need it? currently, i just don't feel like replying anyone's text messages. i just couldn't be bothered anymore. i promised to watch "santau", "my ex" and whatever movies is out now, out on a date and in th end, i just feel like canceling all th plans and th dates that i've made. right now, all i'm looking forward is just th date w girlfs on 14th feb and first day of night class on 22nd. that's all.

yes, truth is.. i go gugagaga over drop dead good looking guys. but not to th extend of wanting them to be part of my life for now eventhough there's part of me just couldn't resist from contacting and getting close to them. perhaps, it'd be okay to go out and spentime together but im afraid i might fall for them. falling is what im trying to avoid for now. so i guessss, it's better for me not to contact anyone for th time being.

prepaid low prepaid low prepaid low, not gonna top up any sooner.

not in th mood, leave me alone.

anyway.. i love my blog song, i never get sick listening to it over and over again, ahaa.

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-08T11:45:00.001+08:00

"The one who loves you most, sometimes hurt you. But again he is the only one who feels your pain.

Takecare kaseh & i won't intrude your life ever again :)"

i've lost counts on how many times you said you won't intrude my life ever again, and if you think you're th one who loves me th most, you're totally wrong. oh my, you still got th guts to say about Love? *my jaw almost drop due to shocking-ness* did you just said that you feel my pains? you gotta be kidding me, my dear bloke. you won't even want to imagine how heartbreaking th feeling was (:

our ~~love~~story might be outdated, it was like so years ago but as i said, there's one thing that i can never forget as you left me something; scars on my heart.

no, i don't hold grudges. it just that i don't need your presence in my life anymore. i would appreciate if you stop intruding my life. so long, takecare.

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-08T11:08:00.000+08:00

its 10:39am right now, i'm still fresh. dad just reached home, now he's reading me a book, tentang islam but at th same time, im blogging. haha, dari tadi baca, tk penatpenat keeeee ayah? ahaha. i feel bad for not paying attention.

anyway, i went to cik sam's place for kenduri yesterday. woooo, how come got alot of familiar faces? th ex-temasekian, th bds-ians. hehehehe, surprising much. and oh, i eyecandied alotalot, best gitu kaaan :P

sister just called me a second ago, she forgotten to bring th camera. aahahaa. i feel like train-ing to yio chu kang to send her th cam, but.. ah nevermind. i changed my mind. tired please. hehehe, da ada niat tu da cukup baik kan kan kan. hehehe, v^^v

im a lil sleepy now, so yup. i shall just upload th pictures and then, go to bed :D

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-08T09:46:00.000+08:00

hello lovely readers! wooo, it's 7:31am right now. i woke up at 6am. slept early yesterday, was feeling so lethargic. but i'm veeeh fresh now ^^

mum woke me up just to ask me fix contact lens into her eyes -.- sis woke me up just to ask me charge th camera's batt -.- ayayai, semua benda kena harapkan kaseh. but kaan, im so touched when sis said, "kaseh tahu tak yang kaseh ni baik hati?" HEHEHE.

i'm currenly sitting next to my dad since he's not working today, gonna head to tamp later in th afternoon to change th scvc box, can't wait to upgrade! wheeeee. then, to popular to buy stationaries. is that all? i think. i wanna eat spaghetti at food culture ^^

i wanna buy bag again so i told dad, "ayah, petang nanti kita gi tamp, singgah bhg k? buy for me th billabong bag, can? sixty dollars aja" and dad replied, "i'l buy for you only if your mum says can. duit ayah semua kaan ibu control". *sobbbbbb* kalau nak dengar cakap ibu.. lupakan aja. fattest hope laa kaaan ); mum will definitely say, "banyak cantik muka kau, jgn nk ngadangada, baru beberapa hari yang lalu aku belikan kau bag nike!" hmph, sedih purrrrrrrrr.

by th way kan, i hate my current hair, mum promised to change th colour of my hair next month. ummm, to what colour? idk. i want to dye, i dont want to highlight. i want to rebond, i dont want to perm cause its not long enough. stresssssss, bahaha -.- kalau rebond, nanti rambut rosaaaaaak. channer? D;

oh ya, i went to buy contact lens today. dark brown, daa malas nak pakai colourcolour yang ketara. hahaha. intention of buying contact lens pun sebab mata poteeeeek, teet teet.

bleah. anyway, i was out to constasands chalet last saturday. before that, i accompanied sisAeynn to bugis to do some shopping. kakak dapat duit birthday, tak adil ); then went back home, and went to th chalet w parents and sister. th toddlers were so cuteeeee, please. geeeeeeraaaaam i :P im so touched that adam and intan still known me as, "kakak kaseh sayang" when i am suppose to be called, "aunty kaseh", ish tk glamournyaaaaa kalau dipanggil aunty. hehehehe. ate alottttt, burps alooottt, weight gained alooottt -.-

*looks up* my most favourite picture of sis, veeeh gorgeous! ;D

*looks up* muka irritaaaatinggg eh! ahaaaaa.

dad looked at this picture and asked me a ques.

"asal bini aku macam tak suka aku amik gmbr dgn dia?"

dad: "ni pula, bini aku nangis ke ketawa bila aku kucup pipi dia?"

kaseh: *laughs* hal laki bini kaseh tknk masuk campur.

assalammua'laikum.

2010-02-05T23:53:00.012+08:00

yay, i finally decided to update my blog after a week it was being abandoned by me. dear blog, im sorry, i didnt mean to do so, perhaps i've lost interest in blogging but out of sudden, you're being missed by me and so, that is why im blogging now ;B

its 2:43am right now, i don't know why i'm talking to my blog. nonsense me, hee he. perhaps, it is to cheer myself up. yes, i was not in a good mood last few hours ago due to some reasons but at that point of time i was webcaming w someone and his smiles have somehow soothed my heart, aww. i almost melted, i tell you ^^v

readers, tell me.. what do you feel if your ex who has left you like a couple years ago forces you not to involve in relationship w anyone now? unreasonable right? it annoys me, like totally. somemore, he lectures you like as though he's one perfect guy. ahhh, he just couldn't stop angering me.

i realised that i've changed, i'm not th weak kaseh who easily teared, upset and get stessed up over small things anymore. get this clear, you're no one to me, you have no right to control me or stop me from doing all th things i want. so stop bothering my life.

i know your intention was good, but please, like i said; i have my life and you have yours too.

and if i were to really gonna involve in relationship any sooner, it's not because i'm trying to forget about you k, please. i repeat, it's not to forget about you cause like i said, you're nothing to me anymore. i've forgotten everything about you since a very long time ago. memories w you are gone. maybe you've left me something and guess what it is? scars on my heart, yes.

this post might hurt you, but th pains you've caused me were more hurtful. i thought we could be friends or at least, be in good terms now but you still give me a reason to hate you. why?

whatever, let's drop th topic...

anyway, today.. i felt like a bird gotten freedom after being caged for ages. hehehe. i sat at home last mon till thurs and finally, i went out today! yes, w mummy! shopppppping at tamp! wheeeee wheeee, yay!

initial intention was to accompany mum but instead, i was th one who shopped. heh heh.

so i bought a bag since night classes gonna start in like two weeks time and a new wallet. only two things and it cost mum $80. oh before that, we had lunched at food culture and something happened, it was hilarious please. i dont want to share w ya'readers cause like.. nevermind, ahaha! but i really gotta say that i got a really understanding Mum, hehe. she so cute please, i like ^^v

but im sad, mum needs to undergo an operation next month, hopefully everything's gonna be alright ); insyaallah.

then we went to courts to buy a camera, then cabbed to bedok to buy groceries at shengshiong. ah, only when we reached home, i realised that mum and i forgotten about buying contact lens for th both of us and sis ); channer leeh lupaa ni, hmph.

bah, i need to buy many more things, how am i suppose to tell mum that th moneehh she gave me is just not enough? oh my, i can imagine what she'll reply me. hahaha, okay i better stop imagining. haha!

i need to sleep now cause i'm going to my cousin's daughter's birthday party at costasands chalet tomorrow, going there in th noon till late night. mesti letih kan, eh eh eh? ayayai. and sunday, got kenduri at mum's friend's place. woo.

ah, i've not been studying! die die i have to start studying soon, if not, i.... die die die. 22nd! :D

speaking of night classes, i was given a letter that thursday class which was supposed to be held at ite simei is changed to ite bishan. ayayai, so troublesome. and oh, i have no class on friday cause th class is changed to saturday, at ite clemeti i think? 2pm till 5pm! i have to wait for another letter since i've made a call to change th classes. and ya, yet to be comfirmed where are all my classes gonna be held at, very troublesome right!

oh ya, one more pathetic thing happened to me today! i went to wash th makeups on my face and i got this habit of spitting out and i saw blood. spitted out again, i saw blood again. im not satisfied, i then spitted out for like 5times and finally, no more bloods. i thought my teeth or gums got blood or something, but no? i dont know laaaaaaa, tekak panas agaknya. ayayaaai. but th weird thing is, it's always like that one, and its not painful, just that th blood and th smell of th blood disgusts me, sooo eeuw gitu kan! iyer.

oh, i've not been reading my chatango offline messages! and also, ive been neglecting my facebook! bah. i'll reply all my offline messages once i've read them all, okay? hee hee, thanks for leaving offline messages, my dear readers (: and about my facebook, i totally apologise cause i can't accept th friend requests, my account is full even after deleting hundreds (almost a thousand) of my facebook friends. and i feel really bad! thousand of apologies! those who were deleted, i'm sorry. really really sorry! who ask you not to talk to me? he he he ;P no la, kiddingggg only, just that i need to accept th more important friends, yup. im really sorry. *sobsob*

and to some of you, stop saying i'm snobbish can or not? i sad you know when you call me like that. i'm not a snob! sampai hati! *sobsob* D;

oh about linking, im sorry if i link some of you wrongly. i'm confuse and blur when it comes to 'relink'. cause by just giving me your url and not telling me your name, i can't possibly relink you if you didnt tell me th name i linked you. correct me if i linked you wrongly okay? thanks dear readers, xoxo. nightnight, miss me k! ^^v

cutesmeth must be sleeping right now, misses!

assalammua'laikum.